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end, before she ever threatened me with the
collar. And even now, I feel like someone has
ripped me from myself. Like I’m at the
bottom of the sea, and who I am, who I was, is
far up at the surface, and I will never get back
there again.”
He didn’t know what to say, what to do
other than to gently pull her fingers from her
palms.
“Did you buy the swagger, the arrogance?”
she demanded, voice breaking. “Did the
others? Because I’ve been trying to. I’ve been
trying like hell to convince myself that it’s
real, reminding myself I only need to pretend
to be how I was just long enough.”
Long enough to forge the Lock and die.
He said softly, “I know, Aelin.” He hadn’t
bought the winks and smirks for a heartbeat.
Aelin let out a sob that cracked something
in him. “I can’t feel me—myself anymore. It’s