Practical Boat Owner – June 2019

Yacht surveyor and designer Andrew Simpson

cruises in his own-design 11.9m (39ft) yacht Shindig.

Read his blog at http://www.offshore-sailor.com

Monthly musings

Andrew Simpson

Shindig’s bow roller and fabricated,

removable cathead makes her a

40-footer which is how she’s

described. To everyone

The long and

the short of it

Size matters with boats, though when it really

matters size can often be... well... fl exible

I

bet most boat owners have done it...

that’s to say have slightly

misrepresented their boat’s size.

You know the sort of thing. ‘Mine?

Oh, just an unassuming little

35-footer I keep down in Lymington.’ By

which he means that it’s a Perdition 345

that’s in truth six inches shorter.

That, of course, is the conversational

length which includes a rounding up

factor generally accepted as legitimate in

polite society. But contrition follows. Next

weekend he bowls up at a marina along the

coast where they charge by the foot. No

doubt, having been consumed with guilt

at his earlier exaggeration, he suddenly

experiences an unfamiliar pang of remorse

which prompts the need to atone.

‘She’s 34 overall,’ he tells berth control,

somehow managing to convey the

impression that the word ‘only’ should

have been squeezed in between ‘she’s’

and ‘30’.

Naturally, marinas are entirely familiar

with this phenomenon. Bursts of excessive

modesty often overcome owners when

they check in at the offi ce. Indeed, in order

to dispel such mortifying delusions, it’s not

unusual to see charitably bent marineros

stalking the pontoons, tape measures in

hand, returning shortly after to inform the

downcast individuals that – joy of joys! –

they needn’t have

humbled themselves

with such paltry claims

since several extra feet

has been discovered

and, consequently,

they can return to their yacht clubs with

their heads held higher. Oh, and by the

way, a trifl ing matter – if they could drop in

with their credit card when next they pass

the offi ce it would be much appreciated.

Unfortunately, for those who respect

exactitude, you can’t even believe what it

says on the tin. A faintly historical look

astern shows that the Contessa 26 was

only 25ft 6in (7.77m) LOA (short measure

there) while the Nicholson 26 is a princely

26ft 7in (8.10m). One presumes that had

the Nic been a Contessa it would have

been given the steroid treatment and

been called a Nicholson 27. Chele and

I once had a splendidly American boat

called a Cal 40 that barely made 39ft.

It’s all very confusing.

In this regard the authorised

measurement methods can be both

helpful and unhelpful. Measurements for

most formal purposes exclude removable

objects. This means that such items as

stemhead fittings and rub-rails are

ignored. Our own boat, Shindig, is

offi cially rated at 11.95m (39ft 2in) which,

when I designed it, allowed me to keep it

below the 12m threshold beyond which

the wretched Recreational Craft Directive

becomes more onerous. For the

performance and internal volume we

wanted, this was only made possible by

adopting a nearly vertical stem, then

extending the bow forward and, most

importantly, the bow roller to keep the

chain away from our paintwork (see

photo) by means of a fabricated and, of

course, removable cathead. In reality this

makes her a 40-footer which is how she’s

described. To everyone.

But marinas care nothing for such hair

splitting. Their interest lies in ‘footprint’ –

the amount of territory a boat occupies.

There’s no disputing that a boat with

overhanging pulpit forward and a dinghy

at the stern is going to take up more

space than one might expect from its

nominal size. We can question the marina

operators’ lack of generosity, and the

miserly aftertaste and impact on customer

relations it leaves, but in including all the

various appendages, it’s diffi cult to

challenge their logic. It is just a matter of

where you draw the line.

But back to the aggrandisement issue.

For some, bragging has moved into a

subtle new league. Some years ago, while

swapping pleasantries

in a Greek taverna with a

fellow boater I had just

met, the subject turned

to the boats themselves.

I started the bidding with

‘40’ and he apologetically responded with

a reluctant ‘55’, adding ‘a motor vessel,

I’m afraid’.

“Nice size,” I murmured.

“Yes,” he admitted. “But the fuel costs!

I’ve already spent over r12,000 bringing it

round from Italy.”

I was aghast. Spending r100 in a

season would have me crying into my

ouzo. “Twelve thousand for a 55-footer!” I

exclaimed.

“Actually...” he paused, almost

apologetically. “Metres, old chap.

Fifty-fi ve metres.”

An

dr

ew

S

im

ps

on

‘For some, bragging

has moved into a

subtle new league’