relationship, Adam represents Christ and Eve represents the church,
because “the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of
the church” (Eph. 5:23).
The relationship between Christ and the church is not culturally
variable. It is the same for all generations. And it is not reversible.
There is a leadership or headship role that belongs to Christ, a role that
the church does not have. Similarly, in marriage as God created it to
be, there is a leadership role for the husband that the wife does not
have. And for our purposes it is important to notice that this relation-
ship was there from the beginning of creation, in the beautiful mar-
riage between Adam and Eve in the garden.
- The parallel with the Trinity.The equality, differences, and unity
between men and women reflect the equality, differences, and unity
in the Trinity. Though I list this here as the tenth indication that there
were differences in roles between men and women from creation, I
will not explain it at this point but in “Key Issue 3” below.
Conclusion.Here then are at least ten indications of differences in
the roles of men and women before the Fall. Some of these indications
are not as forceful as others, though all have some weight. Some
“whisper” male headship, others shout it clearly. But they form a
cumulative case showing that Adam and Eve had distinct roles before
the Fall, and that this was God’s purpose in creating them.
How Do Equality and Headship Work in Practice?
I would like to say something about how male-female equality com-
bined with male headship works out in practice. The situation I know
best is my own marriage, so I will speak about that briefly.
Margaret and I talk frequently and at length about many deci-
sions, whether large ones (such as buying a house or a car) or small
ones (such as where we should go for a walk together). I often defer
to her wishes, and she often defers to mine. In almost every case,
each of us has some wisdom and insight that the other does not
have, and we have learned to listen to each other and to place much
trust in each other’s judgment. Usually we reach agreement on the
decision. Very seldom will I do something that she does not think
44 BUILDINGSTRONGFAMILIES