152 DIVorCe wItH DeCenCY
A laundry list of custody criteria. Here is a listing of some of the
key factors that courts may use in deciding custody: (1) a prefer-
ence by the court for the existing primary caretaker (sometimes
referred to as maintaining the status quo); (2) the amount of time
each parent has available to spend with the child; (3) the lengths
of time the child has previously spent with each parent; (4) the
extent of the child’s integration into a family or extended family
unit; (5) preference for keeping siblings together; (6) each parent’s
ability to meet the child’s health needs; (7) each parent’s ability to
meet the child’s educational needs; (8) overall stability of environ-
ment; (9) financial resources of each parent; (10) failure to have
paid support; (11) any history of interference with visitation ver-
sus a willingness to permit liberal visitation; (12) any history of
one parent undermining the other; (13) frequent changes of resi-
dence; (14) pending move out of state; (15) abduction of the child;
(16) abuse or neglect of spouse or child (any evidence of these
issues is an Achilles’ heel that will, in and of itself, basically sink
an abusive parent’s chance of getting custody); (17) sexual abuse;
(18) alcohol and drug problems; (19) use of tobacco; (20) mental
disability; (21) physical disability; (22) age of parent; (23) age of
child; (24) perjury; (25) nonmarital sexual relationships/cohabi-
tation; (26) child’s relationships with stepparents/stepsiblings;
(27) available help from grandparents or other extended family;
(28) the child’s own preference (especially important for older
children, i.e., approximately twelve years or older); (29) conti-
nuity of childcare; (30) psychological or psychiatric evaluations;
(31) any special needs of the child and each parent’s qualifica-
tions to fill them; and (32) any out-of-court agreements between
the parties themselves.
Let me elaborate a bit on the above list of issues that can be
crucial in custody cases by breaking it into three basic overall
categories:
• Childcare history: who has been doing the primary parent-
ing, who has spent the most time being involved with the
kids? It helps to literally check off on a calendar through-
out the year the days of each parent’s respective involve-
ment. Make notations as to who has been attending the PTA