Case Histories, Anecdotes, and War Stories 183
too high on crystal methamphetamine to care for the kids.” He
also testified that Terri “had exhausted the family’s finances on
drugs.” He turned to the judge and blurted out, “Although my
wife is killing herself, I don’t want her to kill our family too!”
I huddled with my client and pressed her again about the drug
issue. She fidgeted. She squirmed. She refused to look me in the
eye. She lamely reaffirmed, “I swear, I have never tried drugs.”
I nervously replied, “Well, let’s try to convince the court of that
and get you your kids.”
The opposing counsel’s cross-examination of Terri began. It
was stressful. It was the old and all too common “he lied about
this versus she lied about that,” back-and-forth scenario. The
more heated the questioning became, the more agitated Terri’s
physical appearance and movements were. She shifted, she fidg-
eted, she sweated. Her voice trembled at first and then its vol-
ume increased. She began to literally shout back her answers very
defensively at the opposing counsel.
It was becoming obvious to me that my client had been less
than truthful. In fact, she seemed to be all too graphically in the
throes of drug-related, paranoid outbursts. She was out of control
on the very day that she was trying to convince the court of her
even-tempered, maternal qualities. The judge seemed to sense the
same thing and immediately ordered Terri to undergo a drug test.
Not surprisingly, she flunked.
I understand that the children are now doing well with their
father. Custody was his for the asking. He asked. He got it.
Lessons learned:
Drugs can kill. Deceit may not kill outright, but it certainly wounds
very badly in the context of a courtroom.
Thousands of couples divorce because one partner (or both) is
addicted to drugs. Family courts can offer assistance through a myr-
iad of referral or court-ordered services and treatment centers. How-
ever, the addicted person must be able to be honest with themselves
and others. It is essential to be able to care for yourself before you
attempt to care for others, especially young, dependent children.
Be completely honest with your lawyer, if not yourself. Your law-
yer can help you, but only if you are willing to honestly assess your