14 DIVorCe wItH DeCenCY
largely to the relatively new phenomenon of multiple serial mar-
riages. Obviously, when you’ve got everybody marrying multiple
times, it tends to kick up the overall numbers.
The highest numbers of both weddings and divorces occur in
the western part of the country. These numbers are in turn low-
est in the Northeast, with the Midwest and South somewhere in
the middle. An average snapshot of the U.S. population during
the early 1990s showed about 22 percent of the adult population
as single/never married, another 63 percent as currently mar-
ried, 8 percent as divorced, and another 8 percent as widows or
widowers. There is a higher incidence of single or never-married
status among men, whereas more women fall into the widowed
or divorced category.
There is important statistical evidence that fewer folks are mar-
rying at really young ages nowadays but instead are waiting lon-
ger to get married. The median age for first-time newlyweds is
now at 27 for men and 25 for women. This is the oldest age for
first marriages in U.S. history! By contrast, in 1955 the average
ages were the youngest ever—22.6 for men and 20.2 for women.
In the 30 to 34 age group, only 9.5 percent were single as recently
as 1993. Now that percentage is up to 30 percent.
In about two-thirds of all marriages, the husband is older than
the wife, though the reverse is true about one-fifth of the time.
Nearly half of all marriages nowadays are remarriages for one or
both parties. And an astounding 16 percent of the U.S. population
has been married three times.
Marriage is still very much a part of the American dream. After
all, the concept of romantic love has been a universal human trait
throughout the centuries. Romantic passion taps the same dopa-
mine system which is triggered by drug addiction and other
obsessive drives.
Up to about 75 percent of all American adults will marry at
some point in their lives. Similarly, over three-fourths of all Amer-
ican women still say that their concept of the perfect life is to
be married with children, though this percentage has declined
somewhat over the last couple of decades. A majority of even
the unmarried people surveyed still indicate that they think mar-
riage would increase their personal level of happiness. It’s also