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ChAPtEr 3
The Dynamics of Divorce
More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better
comes after the worse.
—Doug Larson
Let me begin this section on the causes of divorce by taking a
quick look at Hawai‘i, where I practice, to see if we can’t divine
some general insights. Hawai‘i has a major problem with divorce.
In fact, our beautiful islands are probably on the cutting edge of
the overall nationwide problem.
Transients and hedonists. Why is the marital dissolution situa-
tion so severe in Hawai‘i? For starters, we have an unusually high
number of transient residents passing through our state. They, in
turn, seem to feel much less restrained in their personal behavior
by what would otherwise be the more self-regulating commu-
nity watch (i.e., communally judgmental) approach that is often
imposed by a permanently entrenched or status quo community.