This is your problem, everybody’s problem. It is the problem of the artist who
wants to fulfill; and he thinks in terms of fulfillment, not in terms of the beauty of
art but how he shall fulfill himself through art. So man has broken up this energy:
human energy and cosmic energy. That’s a fact. Observe it in your life; you are
one thing in the office and another at home. You say one thing and do something
else. If you are rich, you want to be flattered; if you are poor, you are frightened.
So that goes on. So there is this constant breaking up of energy.
When you break up energy, there is conflict. Right? Observe this, sirs, in
yourselves. There is conflict when you break up your life as a religious life, as a
business life, as a scientist, as a politician, as a cook, or whatever it is. When you
break it up, there must be conflict. Do you see this? And where there is conflict
there is the ending of energy, there is a waste of energy. When you resist, that’s a
waste of energy. When you run away from what is, that’s a waste of energy, and
when you follow your guru who tells you what to do, with all the hysterics, the
circuses that go on in the name of religion. Between what should be and what
you are there is conflict, and wherever there is conflict there is division and
therefore struggle, pain, fear. Therefore where there is conflict there is waste of
energy; conflict will inevitably arise when there is a breaking up of energy.
When you don’t live a totally harmonious life, there is a waste of energy. You
say that to find God, truth, you must lead a celibate life, so there is a battle in
you. There is a battle in you; the desires, the sexual urges, lust, are being
suppressed, held back, disciplined, controlled. You think that is the way to reality
and between that and what actually is, is a contradiction. In that contradiction
there is conflict, and that very conflict is a total waste of energy. So one has to
find a way of living that is chaste, non-corrupt, and in which there is no conflict
whatsoever. Then you are full of energy.
Sirs, look. Most of us have had sorrow, not only physical pain but devastating
sorrows in our life, deep, abiding sorrows, tears, aching hearts, despair. We have
all had the thing called sorrow; we all know it. And we run away from it. Do
listen to this, please listen, it’s your life. You run away from it, you say it’s your
past karma, or you try to find the cause of it, or you try to escape from it through
going to the temples, churches, prayers, meetings. You know all the things we do
to run away from this terrible thing called sorrow. So what happens? Sorrow is
there and you escape from it through listening to the radio, sex, God, whatever it
is. And in that escape, in that flight away from what is, there is contradiction, and
therefore there is conflict. In that there is waste of energy. Whereas if the mind
remains alone with sorrow, alone, not trying to run away, not trying to resist it,
remains with it, completely alone, then you will see out of that “alone”
perception there comes that tremendous energy that transforms sorrow into
passion, not lust, into passion, into intensity, into a tremendous energy, which no
book, no guru, no teacher can give. Therefore you have to learn, observe from
yourself and you have the energy that is unending.
Q: Can we seek God through observation?