LA_Yoga_-_June_2018_Red

18 LAYOGA.COM

PRACTICE // MEDITATION + RELATIONSHIPS

by sister shivani

5 Easy Steps to

Harmonious Relationships

H

uman beings are familial beings;

we treasure the company of loved

ones. It is proven that harmoni-

ous family relationships promote

mental, emotional, and physical well-being. In

new relationships, care, compassion, and respect

flow effortlessly. New relationships seem perfect

and it’s easy to envision them remaining that

way forever. However, after some time, the

novelty wears off and things change, because

we not only see the gifts of the relationship but

the challenges as well. Initially we may deny

inner and outer relationship issues, to ourselves

and others. Or we may try to cover them up

with pleasing words and actions. But gradually,

left unresolved, it becomes difficult to sustain

the same level of love and respect for the other

person. So what are we to do when we want to

consciously create harmonious relationships?

Our experience of conflict in relationships

begins in our consciousness. So the healing

also has to begin there. If we try to resolve it in

words but hold bitter thoughts in our minds, the

conflict grows. The strength of a relationship is

determined by what we think about each other,

not how we speak or behave. Our behavior can

outwardly be fine, but our thoughts radiate to

that person as vibrations. So, it is only a matter

of time before we receive similar vibes back and

it triggers conflict. Here are five simple steps to

re-create harmony in strained relationships and

consciously create harmonious relationships.

1. TAKE RESPONSIBILITY.
   The negative energy and emotions during and
   after a conflict can block us from realizing
   our contribution to it. Our ‘Response’ was
   our contribution. Even if the other person
   harmed, betrayed, belittled, disrespected, or
   ignored us...that was their part. Our response
   of anger, hurt, and resentment was our choice
   and creation. When we stop blaming the
   other person and look at our role in creating
   the conflict, healing begins.
   2. THE LAW OF RECIPROCITY.
   The conflict began due to our percep-
   tion about the other person. We created
   negative thoughts, felt negative feelings,
   developed a negative attitude, behaved
   negatively, and then transmitted negative
   energy. Hence, the energy radiated returned
   back to us, full circle. When our thoughts,
   feelings, attitudes, and behaviors turn posi-
   tive, the reciprocating positive energy heals
   us too.
   3. TURN EXPECTATIONS
   INTO ACCEPTANCE.
   Acceptance means understanding the other
   person’s nature and not getting disturbed
   by it. When I accept someone and stop ex-
   pecting them to be or act some other way,
   it limits my internal noise and questions.
   When my mind is stable, I can respond
   proactively. I will then be able to choose
   the right response by remaining assertive,
   loving, and powerful.
   4. LETTING GO.
   Only one of us needs to dissolve our contri-
   bution to the conflict for healing to begin.
   Letting go means that I am not in resistance
   but open to solutions and I do not hold on
   to something any longer than necessary.
   Once we have resolved the conflict, in order
   to move forward, we need to let go of it in
   our consciousness. Thus the saying, “For-
   give and forget.”