FISH POSEI know yoga is supposed to make you calmer and
more focused, but I am very easily distracted.
When I first started, I would get all self-conscious
about my feet. Class would begin with the Sun
Salutations; I’d breathe up, swan dive down, get a
look at my toes, and suddenly be completely out
of what I was doing and into, “Gosh, I really need
a pedicure.” I’d imagine everybody else thinking,
“Her feet look terrible.”
I also check out other people during class—the
ones who seem very advanced, or the ones with
firm abs who don’t have a muffin top yet. I try
to remind myself that they’re probably younger
than me, and I remind myself of my own talent,
which is that I’m very flexible. I notice people’s
butts and then start thinking, “Who’s looking at
my butt?” I worry about whether my T-shirt is
riding up.
One time I was completely distracted by the
television. The yoga room at my gym has a glass
wall you can see through into the main space,
and the TV out there was right in my line of
vision. Everyone else in the class seemed to be
unaware, but I could tell something was going on.
It turned out to be the Boston Marathon bomb-
ing. Now I try to place myself in a spot where I
can’t see the TV, just in case.
I signed up for a series of yoga classes in the
outdoors, at a beautiful, peaceful botanical gar-
den. The “calm in the middle of nature” part was
really good, but I have allergies, so I was dis-
tracted by thoughts like, “I have to sneeze” and
“Is there a bug crawling on me?”
I even tried an online class at home to cut
down on distractions. I was in my bedroom
attempting a balancing pose, turned my head to
get a better look at my laptop, lost my balance,
toppled over, and fell right into the wastebasket.
I had to stop and put ice on myself. It was like,
“Maybe this is not a good idea for me.”
So does yoga make me calmer? No. But it’s a
great feeling when I’m done.