GATE POSEOften, as I practice, I repeat a mantra to myself.
It might be a reminder to be more patient and
less reactive; other times it’s about being grate-
ful and feeling love. The mantra can be as sim-
ple as mentally telling myself to breathe in and
breathe out. After what happened to me, I am so
grateful to be able to breathe.
One Sunday two summers ago, after my hus-
band and I had come home from visiting our boys
at camp, I noticed my back was bothering me.
Every time I took a deep breath, it hurt. I thought
maybe I had injured a rib or pulled a muscle. By
Sunday night, I couldn’t get a full breath in and
was in excruciating pain. I went to the emergency
room, and as soon as they heard my symptoms,
they asked me what kind of birth control I used.
It turned out I had multiple blood clots in both of
my lungs—a potential side effect of my birth con-
trol that is not uncommon, but which I had barely
known about. I was in the hospital for six days. It
was really frightening. I could have died.
Since then, my whole practice has changed.
I used to strive to do every pose the way the
teacher did it. Now it’s less about “How high
is my leg?” or “How flat are my hands on the
floor?” It’s really about being able to breathe.