CHAPTER 7: OFF THE CUSHION: INFORMAL MINDFUL PRACTICES • 151Rechtschaffen (2014) suggests that mindful communication is a way to de-script old
and potentially harmful communication patterns. He offers an exercise in which mindful
communication is used within the context of an argument. This is a wonderful tool to offer
students during a mediation session, walking them through the steps of mindful commu-
nication as they work through their conflict. Here are the steps (Cook-Cottone et al., 2014;
Rechtschaffen, 2014):
- Take some time to feel how your body is responding to the conflict (Rechtschaffen, 2014).
- Feel the bottom of your feet, press into the earth, and relax (Rechtschaffen, 2014).
- Notice your breathing, inhalations and exhalations, and intentionally extend your exhala-
tions (Cook-Cottone, 2015; Rechtschaffen, 2014). - Become aware of any sense of self-righteousness and accept that it is part of being human
(Rechtschaffen, 2014). - Work toward letting go of your perspective for a moment (Rechtschaffen, 2014).
- Orient your awareness to what the other person is saying, listen, and receive their words
(Rechtschaffen, 2014). - Do not plan what you are going to say next (Cook-Cottone et al., 2014; Rechtschaffen,
2014). - Notice how your heart is affected by the person’s words (Rechtschaffen, 2014).
- When the person is finished, refrain from giving advice or making judgments
(Rechtschaffen, 2014). - Use reflective statements to show them that you heard what they had to say: “It sounds
like...” (Cook-Cottone et al., 2014), or “What I heard you feel...” - Speak to them using “I” statements and share directly from your heart (Rechtschaffen,
2014).
The associated principles of embodied growth and learning include: 1, I am worth the
effort; 2, My breath is my most powerful tool; 3, I am mindfully aware; 4, I work toward
presence in my physical body; 5, I feel my emotions in order to grow and learn; 6, I ask
questions about my physical experiences, feelings, and thoughts; 7, I choose my focus and
actions; 8, I do the work; 10, I honor efforts to grow and learn; and 11, I am kind to myself
and others.
WWW: What Went Well
Olson (2014) offers a simple tool for bringing the class together at the beginning and at the
end of the day. At the beginning of the day you can ask, “What went well (WWW) for you
since our last class?” (Olson, 2014, p. 156). At the end of the day, you can ask such questions
as: “What went well in your mindfulness practice today?,” “What went well for you in your
kindness work?,” or “What went well for you today in finding things for which you are
grateful?” Olson (2014) notes that, when you first begin this practice in the classroom, the
typical negative bias will arise as students will think it important to list the things that went
wrong. With practice, you can work into a routine of reflecting happiness, gratitude, mind-
ful problem solving, and their successful informal practices.