New York Magazine - USA (2019-11-25)

november25–december8, 2019 | newyork 51

bathroomandstartcrying.I waslike,Oh

myGod,shefullystolemylife.Shestolemy

wholedaytoday!Thiswasmybiggest

momenteverinfashion,withCarine,Ric-

cardo,andKarl!

I wentbacktothehotel,andOlivierhad

deckedmy roominBalmain:boots,coat.

Beaded,thiscrazy, intricatestuff.Sothere

wasa littlebitofa silverlining.To thisday,

she has the bag in her closet. And I’ve said

toher:“J ustsowe’reclear, inyourwill,this

goestoNorth.”I don’t needit.Thatbagwas

formydaughter.

Overthispastdecade, itseemedtome

thattheculturecametoacceptbody

modificationandplasticsurgeryina dif-

ferentway.Itstoppedbeinga secret.^12

Oh,theInstagramaccountsfromsur-

geonsaresomethingthat I lovetogo

through.Ifsomeoneasks,“What’sone

thingthatpeopledon’t knowaboutyou?,”

there’s reallynothing,becauseeveryone

knowseverythingaboutme.Buttheone

thingthatonlymy closecircleknowsis that

I lovetoresearchevery singleprocedureto

knowexactlywhat’soutthere.Andpeople

callmeallthetime,likereallyfamouspeo-

ple,outoftheblueandarelike,“I knowwe

don’t knoweachother, butI’veheardyou’re

theexpert andI’mlookingtodox, y,andz.

Whowouldyourecommend?”AndI’llbe

like,“Actually,I’vejust researchedthis!”I’ll

meetwithdoctorsandbelike,“Sowhen

I’m50,doyouthinkmy neckis goingto,

like...? What’s thebest way todoit?”

Anotherthingthat’s changedoverthe

lasttenyearsisthatwewentfromtheso-

calledleakedsextape^13 asa thingthatwas

usedtoshamewomentonow,where we

callitrevengeporn.

Wow!I nevereventhoughtaboutthat. I

guessthatquestionis a bittricky. Noteven

formysituation,butbecausemy brother

didpostphotosofhisbabymamaandhe’s

ina revenge-pornlawsuit.Obviously, I get

thedifference.AndI wouldtalkaboutme.

ButI don’t knowtherightthingtosay

withoutmakinghimfeellikethebiggest

pieceofshit.

Butthere’s somany morethingslike that

thathavechanged.I thinktheMe Toocul-

turegoesintothecancel-culturerealm,

wheremaybe...Well,I don’t wanttospeak

forpeoplewhohavebeensexuallyassaulted

becauseI actuallydon’t knowwhat that’s

like.Butevenjust findingloveinthework-

place...That usedtobetheonlyway, you

know.Somany ofmy parents’friendsmar-

riedtheirsecretaries,andweretogetherfor

40 years,andhavechildrentogether.And

nowit’ s like,“Oh,howcouldyou?”The

headof McDonald’s gettingfiredforhaving

a consensual relationship with a co-worker.

Thatkindofthrewmeoff a littlebit,just

thinkinghowtimeshavechanged.

You’ve gottwoboys andtwogirls, and

theymustexpresstheirgenderinsurpris-

ingways.Weliveina worldnowwhere

genderis discussedsodifferentlythan

evena coupleyearsago.

It’svery traditional,what they gravitate

toward.I haven’t shownthem;I haven’t

triedtoswayany decision.I wouldbe

extremelysupportiveofwhatevermy chil-

drenwantedandfelttheywantedtoplay

withandwear.I’mvery openlike that. But

I haven’t dealtwiththat ona personal

level,exceptformaybewithCaitlynand

storiesthat I wouldhearfromherchild-

hood.Hertransition,I think,wasa huge

momentinthisdecade.Wereceivedso

manylettersandmessagesfrompeople

whohavebeenthroughsomethingsimi-

lar. Thatwasreallya momentforme

whereI feltlike,Wow,I’msoproudofour

show.We showedsomuchofthatandour

feelingsandwhatweweregoingthrough,

whethersomeofuswereupset orcon-

fusedorwhatever.We reallyshowedallof

itbecausethat’s naturallywhat yougo

through.I wassonervousforCaitlynjust

becauseI thoughtpeopleweregoingtobe

nasty toher.

SodidI.I didn’thave asmuchfaithin

peopleasI shouldhavehad.

I evensaidat thetime,“Areyousureyou

wanttodothis?Areyousure? Like, come

on.Peoplearegoingtobesoawful.”My

wholethingwasjust,like,“Peoplearen’t

goingtounderstand.Why wouldyouwant

todothat?”Andthenwhenshesaid,“I’m

sure,”I said,“Okay, if you’resure,you’vegot

tolookamazing.”^14

Havingsomuchofyourlifefilmed—

whatisthecumulative resultofallofthat?

Have youeverregrettedit?

I’veneverregrettedit.I’vealwaysfeltlike

I’msogratefultohaveallofthosememo-

rieson-camera.I willlookbackandthink,

OhmyGod,whatwasI wearing?Whyis

mymakeuplikethat?ButI cansitback

andlaughandthinkit’ s funny toseehow

muchI caredandmewantingtobefamous

sobadly.I canlaughat it now:OhmyGod,

I wasdesperate! ■

11 ItaliandesignerRiccardoTisci

is knownforremaking

Frenchfashionhouse

Givenchy. Heis closeto

KanyeWestandreportedly

contributedto Kardashian

West’s stylerevolution,

dressingherforherMet

Galadebutandcraftingher

lace-paneledweddingdress.

12 KardashianWestfamously

gotanX-rayof her

posterioronKUWTKto

proveshedidnothave

implants.In 2016,Kanye

Westspokeaboutgetting

liposuctionbecausehe

wasworriedaboutfans

callinghimfat.

KimKardashian,

Superstarfeatures

Kimandthen-

boyfriendrapper

RayJ havingsexat

a luxuryresort in

2002.Vivid

Entertainment

releasedthetapein

2007.

13

July2015.

14

I’m here in the

hite House

a d then the

n xt day

I as posting,

li e, a crazy

b ini selfie.

PHOTOGRAPHS: PREVIOUS SPREAD, BRIAN TO/FILMMAGIC/GETTY IMAGES (HUMPHRIES); @REALDONALDTRUMP/TWITTER (TRUMP); BACKGRID (DOMES). THIS SPREAD, JANA BIRCHUM (REED); JAMIE MCCARTHY/GETTY IMAGES FOR THE HUFFINGTON POST (MET)