4
Help a friend facing a
mental health crisis.If a friend has withdrawn socially
(from everyone, not just you); is
showing signs of self-neglect
(skipping showers, dressing in
dirty clothes, gaining or losing a
lot of weight quickly); seems irri-
tated or angry, even about minor
things; or has suddenly started
leaving unusual posts on social
media, they may be in a mental
health crisis, says Elena Mikalsen,
PhD, chief of psychology at the
Children’s Hospital of San Anto-
nio. Here’s how to help:TRY TO GET THEM OUT OF THE
HOUSE. “Call and say, ‘I miss you.
I’m going to pick you up so we
can get coffee or take a walk,’ ”
says Mikalsen. “A rut of staying in
bed and not exercising or socializ-
ing can lead to a downward spiral.”KEEP IT SIMPLE. Don’t drag
them to a party. A one-on-one
somewhere you can sit quietly
and talk is best.DON’T TRY TO FIX THE DEPRES-
SION. “The best thing you can do
is just listen and be empathetic,”
says Mikalsen. If applicable,
mention a time when you needed
help: “A couple of years ago, I was
totally overwhelmed, and talking
to a therapist really helped.”OFFER TO HELP WITH TO-DOS.
“When you’re depressed, you
don’t feel like you can handle
anything in your life,” says
Mikalsen. “Ask, ‘Can I help run
errands for you? What’s the most
overwhelming thing you have
to do today?’ ” You can even ask,
“Can I help you find a therapist
who takes your insurance?”WATCH OUT FOR SUICIDAL
THOUGHTS. If your friend states,
online or verbally, that they’re
thinking of ending their life or
expresses anything similarly
alarming, offer to take them to
the ER or a mental health clinic,
or tell someone they live with.3
Save someone who’s choking.
ALWAYS ASK, “ARE YOU CHOKING?” If the person can speak or cough, encourage
them to keep trying to cough up the obstruction. If they are making high-pitched
noises, coughing weakly, or unable to speak or cry, have someone call 911 while
you jump into action.
START WITH BACK BLOWS. Stand to the side of and slightly behind the person. (If
it’s a child, kneel.) Place an arm across their chest for support, bend them over at the
waist, and firmly hit between the shoulder blades with the heel of your hand five times.
THEN TRY ABDOMINAL THRUSTS. Stand behind the person with one foot in front
of the other. If possible, place your front foot between their feet. Wrap your arms
around their waist. Put one fist just above the belly button, grab your fist with your
other hand, and thrust in and up strongly five times. (If the person is pregnant or
too large to reach around, give chest thrusts against the center of the breastbone.)
Switch between five thrusts and five back blows until the person can cough force-
fully, speak, cry, or breathe, or if they become unresponsive.
IF YOU’RE CHOKING AND ALONE, dial 911 or use the emergency call button on
your phone. “The EMTs will find you even if you can’t speak,” says Epstein. You can
lean over the back of a chair and use it to give yourself abdominal or chest thrusts.
LEARN TO SAVE A LIFE IN ONE DAY
You’ve seen those red AED (automated external defibrillator) boxes
everywhere, but would you know how to use it if someone went into
cardiac arrest? Grab a friend and sign up for a Red Cross class to learn
how. In one five-hour session, you can get certified in adult and child CPR
and AED (if you’re short on time, you can take part of the class online).
While you’re at it, download the free Red Cross First Aid app for expert
advice on treating everything from a broken arm to a jellyfish sting.