The Ethicist
and grappling with the tendency of
those around me to simultaneously
over- and underestimate me, something
odd happens to me on a regular basis.
When I go shopping, I end up taking
things home for free. Usually, most
items I’ve bought are on the receipt,
but one item is not — items like bread,
jeans and even new tires for my bike.
Maybe this happens to everyone, but
that’s not my impression. I’m 46, so
I’ve been around long enough to know
people are sometimes stunned by my
congenital amputation. I think they
are so stunned they make mistakes in
ringing up my purchases: In trying
not to stare, they can’t do their jobs for
a few seconds. Or maybe they feel sorry
for me and want to give me something.
Often, I notice before the transaction
is completed or before I leave the
store, so I can correct the mistake.
Sometimes, I don’t see it until I get
home. Th en I feel like I should go
back and pay for the item, even
though this is inconvenient for me.
I guess, after all these years, I would
like permission to let it slide. It’s not
my problem or my fault. I don’t want
to steal, but I hate going back to fi x
someone else’s mistake, especially one
that felt intrusive, unkind and rude.
Melissa Bean Sterzick
In the usual course of things, when a
store has made a large mistake, it would
be appropriate to off er to pay the diff er-
ence. When the amount is small, though,
the store isn’t entitled to your inconve-
niencing yourself, especially given that it
was the store’s fault, not yours. The larger
the amount, the more reason you have to
get in touch.
But what if, as you suspect, this isn’t
the usual course of things? You think that
you’ve been undercharged because the
cashier was disturbed by your missing
hand, and you wonder if it aff ects your
obligations. To be sure, you’re making
a conjecture here. Undercharging can
sometimes be an ordinary slip-up, and
if you’ve become attentive to it, you’ll
simply notice its occurrences more than
others would.
You raise the possibility that the
cashiers are doing it intentionally, and
not randomly or because they’ve been
distracted by your absent hand. I wonder