overrated virtue? Trying to make everyone happy. On
what occasion do you lie? I lie responsibly when there is
the need to be kind. What do you dislike most about
your appearance? The wings beneath my arms. What is
your greatest regret? I do my best to live in the present.
Regret is always in the past. Who or what is the greatest
love of your life? My husband and my work. When and
where were you happiest? Anywhere in New York City,
with my husband in our garden in L.A., and wherever I get
to work. Which talent would you most like to have?
Speaking multiple languages uently. What is your cur-
rent state of mind? Deeply concerned for our country, our
freedom, our safety, our environment, and what we leave
to the next generations. If you could change one thing
about yourself, what would it be? Don’t save every-
thing—throw out more stu! What would you consider
your greatest achievement? Thirty-eight years of mar-
riage, and advocacy for HIV/AIDS and the LGBTQ+ com-
munity. If you were to die and come back as a person or
thing, what do you think it would be? I’ll let the universe
handle that. Evolution is continually surprising me. What
is your most treasured possession? The rst ring my
husband gave me and the Isabelle Stevenson Tony Award.
What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?
Futility. Where would you like to live? Where I do,
between New York City and Los Angeles; would add
Europe. What is your favorite occupation? Working on a
character and producing powerful stories. What is your
most marked characteristic? Perseverance, resilience,
discipline, and commitment to uncovering the truth.
What is the quality you most like in a person? Integrity,
gentility, listening, respectfulness, truthfulness, self-
awareness, kindness, generosity of spirit, humility, empa-
thy, grace, and compassion. What do you most value in
your friends? Humor, fun, connection, trust. Who are
your favorite writers? My husband, Robert Desiderio;
Anton Chekhov; Tennessee Williams; Eugene O’Neill;
William Shakespeare; Paul Monette; Maya Angelou;
Oliver Sacks; Alice Hoffman; Edna St. Vincent Millay;
Søren Kierkegaard. Who are your heroes in real life?
Elizabeth Taylor, Helen Keller, Gandhi, Nelson Mandela,
Eleanor Roosevelt, Greta Thunberg, Malala Yousafzai,
Stephen Hawking, Buckminster Fuller, Ella Baker, the
LGBTQ+ community. What is it that you most dislike?
Lying, worry, undermining, lack of empathy. How would
you like to die? Peacefully.hat is your idea of perfect happiness? Having the opportunity to contribute
and serve. What is your greatest fear? Fear. What historical gure do you
most identify with? Anyone who has worked to make a dierence in the world.Which living person do you most admire? Bryan Stevenson. What is the trait you
most deplore in yourself? I dislike my impatience. What is the trait you most deplore
in others? Bigotry and cruelty in any form. What is your greatest extravagance? Ice
cream—particularly Vivoli gelato in Florence and Van Leeuwen vegan ice cream in New
York City. What is your favorite journey? The one I am on now: living in curiosity and
wonder, risk-taking, and deep connection to others. What do you consider the most
The actress, who’ll next
appear in Net
ix’s The Politician
and Amazon’s Transparent,
on activism and sweetsProust
Questionnaire
Judith
Light
ILLUSTRATION BY RISKOW
164 VANITY FAIR NOVEMBER 2019