support for this view, revealing that different societies allocate different tasks and duties to
men and women and that males and females have culturally defined views of themselves
and of one another.^49United States. To this point, we have talked in broad terms about gender differences
and the role of families in creating those differences. Let us now turn to some specific
cultural differences and how those roles might influence perception and communica-
tion. Before we begin our discussion, it is important that we make note of the fact
that gender socialization has agents besides the family. For example, media, educa-
tional institutions, books, and peer groups, among others,“teach”children“to adhere,
often unconsciously, to culturally accepted gender roles.”^50
We commence with the socialization process among families in the dominant cul-
ture of the United States. The reason for the attention to gender behavior should be
obvious. As Coles points out,“These socially constructed gender expectations for girls
and boys frequently translate into different experiences and roles throughout the life
course.”^51 So powerful are gender roles that children begin to learn how to differenti-
ate between masculine activities and feminine activities when they are just infants. By
“age two children can correctly identify themselves and others as boys or girls.”^52
Knowing these expectations offers clues as to how interaction is carried out. In the
United States, at least within the dominant culture,“appropriateness”is rather spe-
cific. Summarizing the research on gender socializing, we offer the following synopsis:
males are socialized to be assertive, ambitious, aggressive, sexual, self-reliant, competi-
tive, dominant, distant, logical, and rational, whereas females are socialized to be
nurturing, sensitive, interdependent, concerned with appearance, passive, quiet,
gentle, emotional, deferential, and
cooperative.^53
The way parents interact with their
young child is one of the reasons the
various gender differences evolve.
Wood, summarizing the research on
parent–child interaction, notes that
fathers talk more with their daughters
than their sons yet“engage in activities more with sons....Mothers tend to talk more
about emotions and relationships with daughters than with sons.”^54
Gender roles, like culture, are dynamic and subject to change. We begin our
discussion of those changes with the United States. From the start of the twentieth
century to the early 1960s, with the exception of World War II when many women
replaced men in factories to support the war effort, most females were reared to be
wives and assume the roles associated with that position. This, of course, is no longer
the case. Events in the United States have brought about conditions that have influ-
enced the notion of gender. From being members of the Supreme Court to being part
of a police SWAT team, astronauts, or a military combat pilot, females are now
socialized to assume a host of different roles. These new roles mean that“Culturally
defined gender expectations in families are certainly changing.”^55
Men have also been affected by a shift in gender roles. As Wade and Tavris point
out,“It is no longer news that many men, whose own fathers would no more have dia-
pered a baby than jumped into a vat of boiling oil, now want to be involved fathers.”^56CONSIDER THIS
In what ways have gender roles changed in the United States?82 CHAPTER 3•The Deep Structure of Culture: Lessons from the Family
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