of the executive vice president for human resources. The smartly dressed woman seated
behind the desk smiles, rises, and walks around to meet you. Returning the smile, you
step forward and firmly grasp her outstretched hand to signal your self-confidence. With
a nod of her head, she invites you to sit in a comfortable chair while she takes a seat in
another chair across the coffee table from you. The interview is about to begin.
This hypothetical (and perhaps exaggerated) episode was intended to demonstrate
a few of the many and subtle ways nonverbal communication affects your life. In our
little drama, it was assumed that the interviewer would have positive responses to
your nonverbal“messages”of punctuality, grooming, apparel, expression, handshake,
odor, and the like. But would these same behaviors be as successful if you were apply-
ing for a position in another country? The answer isno. Our negative response can
perhaps be better explained with a few examples to demonstrate that misinterpreting
the nonverbal actions of people of different cultures is common.
Arab men often greet by kissing on both cheeks. In Japan, men and women greet
by exchanging bows. Remember that the interviewer greeted you with a simple hand-
shake. In Thailand, to signal another person to come near, one wags one’s fingers
back and forth with the palm down. You will recall that the interviewer sent you a
beckoning message with her palm facing up. In Vietnam, that same motion is reserved
for someone attempting to summon a dog. In Italy and various Arab countries, it is
not uncommon for people to be thirty minutes tardy for an appointment. And there
you were, making sure you were on time for your interview! Tongans sit down in the
presence of superiors; in the West, you stand up, as you did with the interviewer.
Crossing one’s legs in the United States is often a sign of being relaxed; in Korea, it
is a social taboo. In Japan, gifts are usually exchanged with both hands. Muslims con-
sider the left hand unclean and do not eat or pass objects with it. The simple thumbs-
up used in the United States to say“okay”is an offensive gesture in Nigeria. The
Buddha maintained that great insights arrived during moments of silence. In the
United States, people talk to arrive at the truth.
All of the examples to this point were presented for three reasons. First, we wanted to
pique your interest in the subject of nonverbal communication. Second, we used our exam-
ples to underscore the importance of nonverbalcommunication in human interaction. Or,
as Descartes noted,“To know what people think, pay regard to what they do, rather than
what they say.”Finally,wesoughttodemon-
strate that although much of nonverbal com-
munication is universal, many nonverbal
actions are shaped by culture.
To further appreciate the significance of
nonverbal communication, reflect for a
moment on the countless times, besides employment interviews, when nonverbal
messages play a significant role in the transaction. For example, Silverman and
Kinnersley point out that in the medical setting, nonverbal communication“is the
channel most responsible for communicating attitudes, emotions and affect.”^1
Barnlund highlights some additional occasions when nonverbal messages come
into play:Many, and sometimes most, of the critical meanings generated in human encounters are
elicited by touch, glance, vocal nuance, gestures, or facial expressions with or without the
aid of words. From the moment of recognition until the moment of separation, people
observe each other with all their senses, hearing pause and intonation, attending to dressREMEMBER THIS
Remember that although much of nonverbal communication is
universal, many nonverbal actions are shaped by culture.296 CHAPTER 9•Nonverbal Communication: The Messages of Action, Space, Time, and Silence
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