70 _
Another explanationforthe‘cominghome’feelingin
nature is that wecomeintocontactwithsoilbacteria
that we have evolvedwithin tandem,andtheycause
serotonin to bereleasedintoourbrains.NIGHT OUTDOORS
Whatever the explanation,I feelcheerfulandcalm.I am
hungry, though.Butthefastingduringthisquesthasa
reason. “Eatinghasbecomea habitin oursociety,”Rijk
said. “We put allkindsoffoodin ourmouthwithout
thinking aboutit. It’salla distraction,justlikechecking
our phone. It’sgoodtobecomeawareofthat.”I mostly
notice that noteatinggivesmea floatingsensation,
which in turn makestheconversationsI’mhavingin my
head with familyandfriendshavea sentimentaleffect
on me.
It’s getting cooler.“Makesurethatyouenteryour
sleeping bag whenyou’restillwarm,”Henrikhadsaid,
so I take off myshoestoputonthickersocksandam
promptly bittenundermyfootbya horsefly,whichI
then fight withfora whilebecauseit wouldliketobite
me again. I’m onguard.Nightfalls.Unlikeallofmy
friends when ItoldthemwhatI wasgoingtodo,I’m
not worried aboutfeelingunsafefrompeopleroaming
around. Somehow,I feelsecurein myspot.Asif the
trees, whose leafclustersI cannowtracefrom
memory, are protectingme.Also,I havea whistle.If I
blow on that, thequesterswhoaresomewhatnearme
will hear it. No,myonlyconcernsarefoxes,snakes,
mice or rats comingundermytarp.Andthenthere’s
those giant wildhorsesthatwesawduringthewalk
and that I’ve heardneighingin thedistanceseveral
times already.
Snugly tuckedin,I lieonmymatlisteningtothe
rustling in the bushes.Asif I cankeeptheanimalsat
bay with my ears.Andthen,whenI leastexpectit, I fall
into a deep sleep.WhenI wakeup,dawnis breaking.
I’m guessing it’saround5 a.m.Thehorses!I’mgoing
to keep lying here,stayingcompletelysilent.I hear
hooves. My matvibrates.Carefully,I pushtheclothaside.Andseethreecolossalbeastsstandingbythe
ponda fewmetersawaydrinking.I canhearthe
gulpingandsnorting.I seetheirhugemusclesmoving.
Theyaresuchpowerfulanimals.If onlyI hada camera,
I think,asthefirstraysofthesunframethemin halos.
Thebrownoneseemsimpatient,ormaybeplayful.It
runsbackandforthacrossthesand.Pleasedon’trun
intomytarp,I thinkwithmyheartpoundingloudly.Only
whenthewhinnyingdiesawayin thedistance,doI
daretobreatheagain,andgetup.NOMORELISTS
ThesunstillhastorisemuchhigherbeforeHenrikwill
pickmeuparoundnoon.I longformychildren,my
husband,food,a chairtositon—thegroundis very
hard,afterall—butatthesametimeI don’twantto
leave.ThepeacethatI feelis almostintoxicating.I
don’tremembereverfeelingthiswaybefore.Andit
didn’ttakeanyeffort.I’malreadymakinga resolution
tospendmuchmoretimeoutdoors.It’swithgood
reasonthatforestbathingis sopopularin Japan.That’s
a formofmovementmeditationamongthetrees—often
foroneortwodays—thathelpsagainstfatigue,stress
andotherailments.Butaccordingtoresearchers
fromtheNipponMedicalSchoolin Tokyo,Japan,a
three-hournaturewalkwillalsocalmthemindand
body,enoughfora wholeweek.
Backatbasecamp,weeatlentilsoupandshareour
experiences.Someofusfoundit moredifficultthan
others,butweallagreethatit’stotallyabsurdthatthis
naturalenvironment,whichhassucha magicaleffect
onus,is notcherishedmorelovingly.
Twodayslater,despitehavingeatena hugepizza,
I stillfeellightheaded.Everythingseemstobesimpler
andeasierwiththeafter-effectofnaturestilllingering.
NotonlydidI checkoffthenaturequestfrommyto-do
list,I’vedeletedmywholeto-dolist.We’lljustseewhat
happens.AndforhowlongI canholdontothis
peacefulnesswithinme.
TEXTEVA LOESBERGPHOTOGRAPHYKYLE MIMS @MIMSKYLE‘Only when the whinnying dies away in the
distance , do I dare to breathe again , and get up’