(^20) DAILY MIRROR FRIDAY 06.09.
DM1ST
A MOGGERY OF POLITICS
The defining image of
this arrogant, smirking,
self-satisfied and
contemptuous government
is already set in stone.
It is the picture of languid
Jacob Rees-Mogg, the Leader of
the House of Commons, stretching
his double-breasted length on the
front bench.
Draped upon the green leather like a
praying mantis at rest, he surveys all
before him with supreme
indifference.
Why not? He is the rich
scion of a Somerset coalfield-
owning family, made wealthy
by the sweat of colliers’ brows.
If he fails to achieve his heart’s desire – a
no-deal Brexit – he can always go back to
counting his hedge-fund millions.
The last pit in the county closed in 1973,
when he was still on his nanny’s knee.
Has he ever really left it?
Go Downton the
stairs and never
disturb the toffs
DOWNTON Abbey
was a smash hit on
telly, and the film is
likely to be just as
popular.
Coming to a cinema
near you, the 1920s
aristo-soap features the
original cast and goes
upmarket with a visit
from King George V and
Queen Mary.
Their regal descent
provokes a stir among
the Crawleys and the
servants alike, we are told in advance
publicity. Well, it would, wouldn’t it?
The English like nothing more than
wallowing in a nostalgic haze about the
aristocracy. Throw in the royal family,
and you have emotional overload.
But the whole thing is fantasy.
More than that, a cruel hoax.
The aristocracy (it’s ancient
Greek for “rule of the best”) was
never the caring, sharing,
benevolent class that Downton
makes them out to be. They
weren’t gripped by social
conscience, quite the opposite.
The Duke of this and the Earl
of that made their fortunes by exploiting
people and natural resources, often coal.
They built their big houses on the backs
of working class families – whom they
evicted from their tied homes if they
dared to strike for a better life.
Today, they’d have fracking firms all
over their rolling acres – out of sight of
the drawing room, naturally.
The idea that the Crawleys of this
world were – or are, right now – benevo-
lent employers who cared deeply about
their servants is strictly for the birds.
Peacocks on the lawn, most likely.
It’s no coincidence that this dreamy
period drama is written by a multi-
millionaire Tory peer, Julian Fellowes,
Baron of East Stafford, once described as
a right-wing libertarian in
the image of Thatcher.
A diplomat’s son, privately
educated prior to Cambridge
and the Footlights, he was
ennobled by David Cameron.
A Deputy Lord-Lieutenant of
Dorset, he writes with
brilliant imagination.
But he’s never had to
endure real life below stairs. For a dose of
reality, read George Orwell’s brutally
honest The Road To Wigan Pier, which is
set in the same period.
Unlike the sugar-coated world of
Downton Abbey, there are no senti-
mental happy endings in between-the-
wars Lancashire pit villages. Just
back-breaking work to keep the landed
gentry in style.
I say, Carson, have you ironed the Daily
Mirror yet?
SENTIMENTAL The story of the Crawleys is sheer fantasy
‘‘Aristocrats
built their big
houses on the
backs of the
working class
Pay
to watch
football in the pub?
I’d pay to have it
switched off.
Telling it like it is...
PAUL
ROUTLEDGE
6
Reader Andy Wood of Bolton,
Lancs, kindly (I think) sent this pic
of my gargoyle lookalike on Chichester
cathedral. Makes a change from
Captain Mainwaring jibes, I suppose.
But what am I ranting about?
Affront bottom
their daughter. The survey of 1,
parents also found almost a third
felt it was only appropriate to use
anatomical language when their
daughters were aged 11 or older.
Actor Nigel Havers, who supports
the campaign, said: “It is so
incredibly important to have honest
and open conversations about our
children’s bodies.
“So many people don’t use the
proper words for female body parts
in their own homes.”
[email protected]
@DailyMirror
euphemisms, with less than
20% frequently saying “vagina”
and only 1% often using “vulva”.
Around one in five parents said
they never refer to female
body parts in front of
PARENTS are being urged to
stop using words such as “bits”,
and “front bottom” when refer-
ring to their daughters’ genitals.
Charity Eve Appeal said both
male and female body parts
should not be shrouded
in secrecy and called on
mums and dads to use
the correct terms.
A poll for the charity
found 44% of parents
regularly use
Parents urged to
use right names
for girls’ genitals
BY JANE KIRBY
SUPPORT Nigel Havers
nandana
(Nandana)
#1