Woman’s Own – 26 August 2019

Frightening

eventscan

cause PTSD

Q

A yearago,I wasattackedinmyhouse.My

windowsandcarweresmashed,andI was

threatenedwitha knifeinfrontofmykids,who

wereonlyagedsixandnine.Thepolicecame

quickly,andthecouncilwasgreatinmoving

us.I knowthatwearenowsafeandthekids

seemedtohaveforgottenit,butatnightI get

terriblenightmaresandsometimeswhenI am

aloneinthehouseI havehorribleflashbacks.

I don’twanttobeterrifiedallthe time.

Nameandaddresswithheld

A

You’reexperiencingsomethingknownas

post-traumaticstressdisorder(PTSD),and

that’snotsurprisingafterallthatyouhavebeen

through.Thisis ananxietydisordercausedby

stressful,distressingandfrighteningevents.As

a yearhaspassedandyouarestillexperiencing

flashbacksandnightmares,youneedtosee

yourGPforhelpandadvice.Also,contactVictim

Supporton 0808168 9111.Theyofferfreeand

confidentialsupport.Trustthembothastheycan

help you and your family move beyond this.

3 ways...

to feel more relaxed

She’sjustsohard

toworkwith

Q

Iworkwithanolderwoman

whois extremelycriticaland

hardtoworkwith.Sheseemsto

takepleasureintellingmeand

myfriendsthatourworkisn’t

goodenoughandis oftenrude

withhercriticism.Sheneverhas

anythinghelpfultosay,andI

knowI shouldsaysomething,but

I don’twanttomakehertreatme

anyworse.She’smakingme

dreadwork.WhatcanI do?

Sue,41,Leicestershire

A

Itseemsthatnomatter

whereyouwork,thereis

someonewhomakesworkinglife

horriblewiththeirbehaviourand

inabilitytobenice.Thekeyto

dealingwiththiswomanis tobe

straight.If she’snotafraidtobe

blunt,dothesameback.If she’s

rude,callheroutonit.Andif

she’scritical,askherhowshe

thinks it would be made better.

A

Over60ssex

is something

peoplecanfeel

embarrassed

toconsider,and

yetmanyolder

peoplearesexually

activeandwhy

shouldn’ttheybe?That

said,nomatterwhatyourage,it’s

nevernicetohearyourparents

havingsex.Justbeopenandhonest

withyourmum– tellherwhat’s

happened and laugh it off with her.

1

SPENDTIME

WITHFRIENDS

ANDCHILDREN

Thenaturalfeel-

goodeffectis called

‘tendandbefriend’

andis theopposite

ofthefight-or-flight

stressresponse.

2

STAYFOCUSE D

Procrastination

cancausestress,

so get in the habit

I’m still

terrified

Iheardthem

havingsex

Q

Iamembarrassedtosay

this,butwhenmy70-year-

oldmumcametovisitme,she

broughtherpartnerwithher

andI heardthemhavingsex.

I havebarelybeenabletolook

athersinceasI feelsoawkward.

Shekeepsaskingmewhat’s

wrong.WhatdoI say?

Lynne, 49, Middlesex

40%

ofmenand

womenaged

(^65) to (^80) are
sexually
active
Mum-of-two
AnitaNaik
hasbeenan
agonyauntfor
25 years.
ADVICE
Good
A problem shared
ContactAnita
[email protected],
follow her on Twitter @AnitaNaik, or go to anitanaik.com
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