Craig says, ‘I really
don’t know how I’ve
managed to go wrong so
many times. I just want
to help and everyone else
makes it look so simple.
But at the end of the day,
the things I’ve broken are
just that – things. They
can always be replaced.’best for REAL LIFE
‘Worried our
marriage
couldn’t
survive, I
banned
him from
doing DIY’
the kitchen covered in smoke.
‘Why are all the wires
plugged into the wrong
places?’ the electrician
puzzled later. I knew...
Worried our marriage
couldn’t survive his efforts,
I banned him from doing
any DIY.
However, I didn’t think
we could go far wrong within’s clumsiest man!
him just helping out around
the house.
So, when he called, saying
the fridge freezer wasn’t
working properly, I suggested
he defrost it. I arrived home
to the smell of burning plastic
and Craig looking sheepish.
‘I put a two-bar electric
heater in to melt the ice,’ he
explained. ‘But the shelves
melted as well.’ He’s the only
person I know who could set
fire to a fridge...
Or cause a car crash despitenot being able to drive.
I’d popped into
McDonald’s, leaving him
in the car with the boys.
I came outside to
screaming customers
and staff, gathered
around a car... my car!
Trying to change the radio
station, Craig had knocked
off the handbrake, causing the
car to smash into the front of
the restaurant, leaving a huge
hole in the wall.
So, when the oil in my car
needed topping up, I should
have known better than to
accept Craig ’s offer of help.
All was fine as I drove
off to my job as a catering
assistant, but then thick
smoke started to billow out
of the engine. I pulled over...
and the engine blew up.
Craig hadn’t used a
funnel and had spilled oil
in every nook and cranny
of the car’s system.
‘It’ll have to be written off,’
the rescue mechanic said.
I was furious, but I could
hardly stay mad. Craig
couldn’t understand where
he’d gone wrong.
Now 55, over the years
we’ve forked out a fortune
on Craig ’s mishaps, and I’m
scared we’ll go bankrupt if‘If^ there’s
one^ thing
I’ve^ learned’
‘No^ one^ is^ perfect^ and^ ifyou’re^ going^ to^ be^ in^ a^
relationship,^ you^ have^ to
accept^ your^ partner^ for
who^ they^ are.’he doesn’t stop – or that I’ll
develop eye ache from rolling
them so much!
Just a few weeks ago, he
insisted on wallpapering over
our hot pink bedroom wall,
but he failed to line up the
flowered pattern, so now it
looks even worse.
Craig could tell that I was
upset with the job he’d done,
so he offered to take me to
Blackpool for the weekend.
A touching gesture. But, as
we arrived, Craig realised he’d
booked the return tickets for
the same day. We only had
a few hours before we had
to board the train home.
‘It’s a good job I love you,’
I told him affectionately.
And it’s true. Craig ’s
clumsiness may have me
tearing my hair out, but
I wouldn’t change him,
flaws and all!Some wives do ’ave
’em! Craig can drive
Debbie crazy with
his real-life
Frank Spencer
behaviourBut they still
love each other
all the sameHow did he
manage to
set fire to
the fridge?WORDS:AMY^WALTERS,^ SARAHWHITELEY^PICTURES:^ SWNS