Daily Mail - 17.08.2019

Page 48 QQQ Daily Mail, Saturday, August 17, 2019

STUNNING IN A STETSON

Brad first lit up the big screen as cowboy J.d.

in Thelma and Louise (1991). a small-time

bank robber, he was devilishly attractive in his

white Stetson hat. Watching his big bedroom

scene with Thelma (Geena davis), millions of

women had the same thought at the same

time. No, not that one. This one: ‘Who the heck

is that dude?’

It was only a cameo performance, but it had

a huge impact, making the unknown boy from

Missouri famous overnight. It wasn’t long

before my phone rang. ‘Jangelina,’ came a

frightened voice. ‘What should I do next?’

F

IrST of all I want to say thank

you. Thank you for finally break-

ing free from angelina and saving

your best years for women every-

where, but mostly for me.

It has been a long wait, but I like to think it has

been worth it, for all of us, for both of us, but yes,

mostly for me. For now, at 55, you look better than

you ever did. and Brad, that is saying something.

With your dirty blond hair and that chiselled jaw,

you have always had classic movie-star good looks,

but in your case suffused with something more

soulful; like some heavenly hybrid of robert redford

and fluffy puppy. remember I said exactly that to

you many years ago? and you lovingly replied that if

I didn’t move away from the entryphone at the gate,

you would call the police?

My sweet Brad. We have always been close, you and

I — inside the whirling canyons of my mind, if

nowhere else. and it was a silly mistake, just a slipped

vowel between two colliding worlds, when you

accidentally married Jen instead of Jan all those

years ago. How well I remember that wedding! One

that I had certainly expected to see through a veil,

Brad, but not a veil of tears.

It was unusual because the groom was almost as

pretty as the bride. It still pains me to think about it.

But I forgive you, like I always do. and let us not

speak of the angelina years, just focus on the fact

that you always come back to us, but mostly to me.

and now with two marriages and six children in

your wake, you are like a great sail unfurling on the

home stretch, like a fine wine uncorking in slo-mo as

you upgrade from classic vintage to a grand cru. No

longer the pin-up pretty boy, you have become more

and not less attractive with the passing years.

all this is brought sharply into focus in your new

film, Once Upon a Time... In Hollywood. You play

the role of Cliff Booth, stuntman to actor rick dalton

(Leonardo diCaprio.) You really are the tough guy

he only pretends to be onscreen. In one entirely

gratuitous but glorious scene you climb onto his roof

to fix the TV aerial. It is hot up there, so you stick a

beer into your tool belt and whip off your shirt.

There are actual gasps in the cinema when this

happens and Brad, not all of them came from me.

Women across the land are going absolutely crazy

about how gorgeous you are in 2019 Technicolor —

and how fabulous it is that you have maintained your

physicality with discipline and workouts.

darling Brad, I like to think that every time you

pick up a dumb-bell in the gym, you think of me,

your precious Jangelina. In the meantime, let us

consider exactly why everyone is mad for Brad...

PERHAPS one of the greatest

things about Brad is how he wears

his Norse-god good looks so

lightly, onscreen and off.

Once Upon A Time... In Holly-

wood is set in 1969, where his

stuntman character Cliff pads

around LA in Minnetonka

moccasin boots, yellow T-shirts

and aviator sunglasses.

In his most charming role to

date, nothing dents Cliff’s coolness

or bulletproof charm, whether he

is relaxing on the set (above) or

driving around the city. In the film

he has a dog called Brandy, a fond-

ness for Kraft macaroni cheese

and he is happy playing second

wheel and emotional support to

his more famous boss.

The film explores themes of

male friendship alongside grow-

ing old while losing your looks

and your potency. Is this the role

that will deliver Pitt an Oscar?

Certainly it showcases that cool

masculine quality that only big

movie stars such as him exude.

BAD HAIR DAY

TO FIGHTING FIT

PROVING that even hunks can

have a bad hair day, Brad’s

bleached hippie look (above) is not

one of his best. Thankfully he comes

to his senses to appear in one of his

most iconic roles in Fight Club (1999).

‘I don’t want to die without any scars,’

says his character Tyler Durden. His

topless scenes (right) were such a hit they

sparked a global Google search. More than

18 million men asked the gods of the internet:

‘How can I get a body like Brad Pitt’s in Fight

Club?’ As Brad well knows, there was a follow-

up called Jan Club, but the first rule of Jan

Club is that you do not talk about Jan Club.

MOCCASINS AND MACARONI CHEESE

1

2

Corbyn: Let

start-ups

take over

vacant shops

VaCaNT high street shops should be given

to start-ups and community projects to

reverse a ‘retail apocalypse’ and stop the

town centres becoming ghost streets,

Jeremy Corbyn will say today.

The Labour leader wants councils to be given

the power to reopen abandoned shops which

have been vacant for 12 months or more.

On a visit to Bolton, Mr Corbyn will say the

proposals would rejuvenate ‘struggling’ high

streets by bringing back into use some of the

estimated 29,000 retail units which have been

abandoned for over a year.

Under Labour’s plan, local authorities will be

able to turn vacant shops over to start-ups, co-

operative businesses and community projects.

The party said this would help reverse the ‘eco-

nomic decay’ of town centres.

Mr Corbyn will say: ‘Boarded up shops are a

symptom of economic decay under the Conserv-

atives and a sorry symbol of the malign neglect

so many communities have suffered. Once thriv-

ing high streets are becoming ghost streets.

‘Labour has a radical plan to revive Britain’s

struggling high streets by turning the blight of

By Larisa Brown

Political Correspondent

Soldfinger! 007

car hits £5.2m

THE bumper-mounted machine guns, tyre

slashers and passenger ejector seat might not

be of the most practical use.

But that hasn’t stopped an unnamed bidder

splashing out £5.2million on James Bond’s

famous DB5 from Goldfinger and Thunderball.

The 1965 Aston Martin became the subject of

a fierce bidding war at the world’s biggest car

auction in Monterey, California, and beat the

previous record for the car by £1.6million.

One of four built for the films and promo-

tional events featuring 007 star Sean Connery,

it has 13 modifications by the movie’s special-

effects team. These include two Browning rep-

lica machine guns, wheel-hub mounted tyre

slashers and a bulletproof rear screen.

Barney Ruprecht, of auctioneers Sotheby’s,

said: ‘We are beyond thrilled with the result.’

Star and car: Sean Connery with DB5

empty shops into the heart of the high street,

with thousands of new businesses and projects

getting the chance to fulfil their potential.’

Labour local government spokesman andrew

Gwynne said: ‘Under this Government, our high

streets have suffered a retail apocalypse.

‘High street closures are at a historic high,

leaving too many of our once thriving towns

abandoned and awash with boarded up shop

fronts. Labour will turn around the mess the

Tories created and will give local authorities the

power to make our high streets the pride of our

communities that they once were.’

But Jake Berry, the Tory local growth minister,

claimed: ‘Jeremy Corbyn would wreck the econ-

omy, tax small businesses and scare off the invest-

ment needed to help our high streets, meaning

more boarded-up shops and fewer jobs.

‘We will deliver Brexit by October 31 so that we

can get on with levelling up opportunities across

our country and breathe new life into high

streets and town centres.’

‘He would wreck

the economy’