Daily Mail - 19.08.2019

Daily Mail, Monday, August 19, 2019 Page 47

where they were not allowed to

express discomfort, where even

a simple statement like ‘I’m

cold’ was considered selfish

and annoying. If your colleague

is prone to an indirect style of

communication, the onus is on

you and your nunchi to be

aware of this and to adapt

your behaviour.

DO YOU REALLY

NEED TO ASK THAT?

ThInk about your office

meetings: many people ask

questions to show off or to

brown-nose the boss, or just

to be seen to be participating.

Are the people asking the

most questions in meetings

automatically getting respect or

bonuses? Sometimes asking a

lot of questions will just earn

you eye rolls from your

colleagues, who are fixated on

the fact that it’s 12.30 and the

queue at the canteen is getting

longer by the second.

Read the room and don’t

always feel you have to ask every

question that is in your head.

DO NOT IGNORE

YOUR GUT REACTION

When someone is skilled in

nunchi, koreans don’t say that

person has ‘good nunchi’, they

say the person has ‘quick

nunchi’. Being right is some-

times useless if you’re too slow.

People with quick nunchi are

speedy judges of character. We

often suppress the wisdom of

our first impressions because

we’re taught to give everyone

the benefit of the doubt.

But human instincts — gut

feelings — have evolved over

millions of years and are woven

into our DnA. It is Ok to judge

a person based on your nunchi.

You don’t need to ‘earn’ the right

to decide for yourself whom you

do and do not trust.

O AdApted from the power Of

Nunchi: the Korean Secret to

Happiness And Success by euny

Hong, published by Hutchinson

on September 5 at £12.99. © euny

Hong 2019. to order a copy for

£10.40 (offer valid to September

2; p&p free on orders over £15),

call 0844 571 0640.

Welcome to

the ancient

Korean

philosophy

that’s the key

to success

in life, work

and romance ...

Find your

TO SMOOTH your bra strap bulge, try

resistance band ‘flashers’ says celeb-

rity personal trainer Nadya Fair-

weather (u-shape.co.uk). Fold the

band in half or wrap the ends until

the resistance is fairly strong. Stand

tall, feet apart,

holding the band at

shoulder height.

Now holding the

ends,

open

your

arms further out

until you can’t go

farther, then

bring the band

back until your

hands are close

together. Try and

do as many as you

can for 30 seconds,

then take a 30-

second rest.

Repeat five sets.

TO BLITZ back fat, nutritionist Shona

Wilkinson (shonawilkinson.com)

recommends the following foods.

Seaweed is a great snack, as it

contains iodine, which plays

an important role in the

body’s metabolism — and will

help with weight loss.

Apple cider vinegar

also helps to stimulate

the metabolism and

improve blood sugar lev-

els. The best is the less

processed, cloudy ver-

sion, which looks like it

has bits in it. They are

where a lot of the health

benefits come from.

Set a target of five portions of veg a

day, then up it to eight. This will help

weight loss and reduce your bra strap

bulge — and you get an amazing

intake of nutrients. Concentrate on

dark green vegetables.

what to wear

15

GET FIT IN

MINUTES

what to do

what to eat

Sports bra,

£75, net-a-porter.com;

Top £29.95, johnlewis.

com; Resistance band,

£26.99. amazon.co.uk;

Trainers, £125,

hokaoneone.eu;

Leggings, £69,

fashercise.com;

date avoiding questions about

family because he is an orphan,

or because he has just buried

them all in his back garden?

He’s unlikely to tell you either

on first meeting, but you might

at least learn there is some

issue about his family that

makes him uncomfortable. Is

he vague about where he lives

because he doesn’t want to

give away too much personal

information or because he has

a wife and two kids at home?

It’s also helpful to gauge your

date’s nunchi skills. How do

they relate to the room them-

selves? If the wine they wanted

isn’t available, for example, do

they make a big deal of it or do

they just choose another one?

Are they friendly and

approachable to others, or

closed off and guarded? Don’t

just judge the way they behave

with you, but assess the way

they behave with everyone.

Finding the right partner

requires plenty of nunchi.

Some friends will tell you to

make a list of must-haves —

money, looks, good job — and

not to budge from these.

Others will tell you the exact

opposite — that you have to

throw your must-haves out of

the window or you will remain

alone for ever.

Nunchi is the middle path

here. You neither have to drop

all your standards nor enforce

them unrealistically; it is impor-

tant you are discerning and

adaptable. Observe carefully,

gather impressions, and don’t

ignore ones that tell you what

you don’t want to hear.

Think of the couples that you

love to be around — I bet

they’re the ones with good

nunchi. Couples who are

considerate of each other’s

feelings and who can antici-

pate each other’s needs have a

way of spreading those good

and thoughtful vibes to others.

We all want to spend more time

with people like this.

The opposite is true for

couples with poor nunchi, who

either do not see or do not

care about their partner’s

needs. Everyone dreads having

these couples around.

CAN HELP YOU FIND LASTING LOVE

(and learn to read people’s minds)

Nunchi

Picture: ALAMY

Illustration:

L. THOMAS