Seeingandtreatingthatwoundtakescourage
andtenacity: whiletheleaderiscallingfollowers
tofullness,thefollowersareaccusingtheleader
ofnotdoinghisorherjob.Everyteacherwhohas
triedtocreatea spacefora self-sustaininglearning
communityknowsthisstory:studentsresistonthe
groundsthat“wearenotpayingtuitiontolistento
JohnandSusietalk,buttotakenotesfromyou,the
personwiththePh.D..”It takesa deeplygrounded
leader—aleaderwitha sourceofidentityindependent
ofhowpopularheorsheiswiththegroupbeing
led—toholda spaceinwhichpeoplecandiscover
theirresourceswhilethosesamepeopleresist,angrily
accusingtheleaderofnotearninghisorherkeep.
Inthefaceofresistance,anungrounded
leaderwillreverttobureaucraticmode: the
teacherwillreverttolecturingratherthaninviting
inquiry,themanagerwillreverttorule-makingrather
thaninvitingcreativity.Inthefaceofresistance,leaders
willdowhattheyaretaughttodo:notcreatespace
forothers,butfillthespacethemselves—fillit with
theirownwords,theirownskills,theirowndeeds,their
ownegos.This,ofcourse,ispreciselywhatfollowers
expectfromleaders,andthatexpectationprolongs
theperiodduringwhichleadersofcommunitymust
holdthespace—holdit intrustuntilpeopletrust
theleader,andthemselves,enoughtoenterin.
Thereisa nameforwhatleadersexperience
duringthisprolongedperiodofpatient
waiting.Itiscalled“suffering”(whichistheroot
meaningoftheword“patience”).Sufferingiswhat
happenswhenyouseethepossibilitiesinotherswhile
theydenythosesamepossibilitiesinthemselves.
Sufferingiswhathappenswhenyouholdintrusta
spaceforcommunitytoemergebutotherslackthe
trusttoenterthespaceandreceivethegift.Suffering
iswhathappenswhileyouwaitouttheirresistance,
believingthatpeoplehavemoreresourcesthanthey
themselvesbelievetheyhave.Butleadersdonot
wanttosuffer.Sowecreateandmaintaininstitutional
arrangementsthatprotectleadersfromsuffering
byassumingtheworstoffollowersandencouraging
leaderstodominatethembymeansofpower.I haveyettoseea seminarinsuffering
aspartofa leadershiptrainingprogram.
I canthinkofthreereasonswhy.One,wetrain
leadersforbureaucracyratherthancommunity,
nomatterwhatwesaywearedoing.Two,theidea
ofleadershipisstillsosteepedinmachismothat
wedonotwanttoacknowledgea “weakness”like
suffering.Three,sufferingisa spiritualproblem,
andwewanttokeepleadershiptraininginthe
orderlyrealmoftheoryandtechniqueratherthan
engagetherawmessinessofthehumanheart.Butleadershipforcommunitywillalwaysbreakour
hearts. Soif wewanttoleadthisway,wemusthelpeach
otherdealwiththatfact.Wemightbeginbyviewing
theproblemthroughthelensofparadox,thatspiritual
wayofseeingthatturnsconventionalwisdomupside
down.Here,“breakingyourheart”(whichwenormally
understandasa destructiveprocessthatleavesone’s
heartinfragments),isreframedasthebreaking
openofone’sheartintolarger,moregenerous
forms—aprocessthatgoesonandonuntiltheheart
isspaciousenoughtoholdbotha visionofhopeand
therealityofresistancewithouttighteninglikea fist.If wearewillingtoembracethespiritualpotentials
ofsuffering,thenbothcommunityandleadership,
humanresourcefulnessandthecapacity
toholdit intrust,willprovetobeabundant
amongus—giftswehavebeengivenfromthe
beginningbutarestilllearninghowtoreceive.OLD THINKING NEW THINKING
Community is a goal. Communityisa gift.
We achieve community through
desire, design and determination.
We receivecommunitybycultivatinga capacity
for connectedness.Community requires a feeling
of intimacy.
Communitydoesnotdependonintimacyandmustexpand
to embracestrangers,evenenemies,aswellasfriends.Community is a romantic
Garden of Eden.
Communitythatcanwithstandhardtimesandconflictcan
help us becomenotjusthappybut“athome.”Leadership is not needed in
communities.
Leadershipandtheauthoritytoleadtowardcommunity
can emergefromanyoneinanorganisation.Suffering is bad and should
be avoided.
Suffering letsour“heartsbreakopen”enoughtoholdbotha vision
of hope andtherealityofresistancewithouttighteninglikea fist.1 1.
E S S AYS 17