MEANTEENS
There’slittledoubtteenagerscanbeex-
tremelycruelandoblivioustohowhurt-
fultheircommentscanbe.AndI speak
frombitterexperience,havingbeenmer-
cilesslybulliedasa childandteenager
forbeingextremelyshyandwithdrawn.
MyheartbleedsforDuanStroebel,
whoserarechroniccysticacnecaused
himuntoldpainandhumiliation(YOU,
18 July).Onecan’timaginehowthisal-
readyself-consciousteenfeltwhensome
ofhispeersexiteda swimmingpool
whenhewantedtogetin.
Anda highfivetotheclosefriendswho
stoodbyhim– atleastheknowswhohis
truefriendsare.I’msopleasedthere’s
lightattheendofthetunnelforthis
15-year-oldwho’ssufferedenough.
BEV,EMAILPUTTHEKIDSFIRST
Beinga singleparentdealingwithan
ex-husbandwho’sa defaultingmainte-
nancepayer(YOU, 11 July),I wonderwhy
divorcedparentsaren’tabletoputtheir
issueswiththeirexesasideand,forthe
sakeoftheirchildren’swellbeing,pay
theirmaintenanceobligations?
I alsowonderwhysocietyandthelegalDISPENSING WARMTH AND LOVE
W
HAT I saw on
Mandela Day
at OR Tambo
Hall in Khayelitsha,
Cape Town, was amaz-
ingandinspiring.
Itwasrainingand freezing cold and
peoplewerequeueing for soup and cof-
fee.I wassurprised to see how many
peoplewerethereto care for the under-
privileged.
It wasbeautifuland I hope other prov-
incesaredoingthesamething– I don’tmean a feeding scheme necessarily, I
mean anything to help those who come
from disadvantaged backgrounds.
To all those who left their warm homes
and families just to serve the community,
we really appreciate what you did. I want
to single out the elderly helpers because
they’re the ones who brought us into the
world and protected us as children.
You’ve proved to us that Khayelitsha
isn’t just a high-crime area – there are
also many good people here.
BONGAMAXWELLPLAATJIE, EMAILI
RECENTLYattendedthe21st
birthdayofthedaughterofoneof
mycousins.I lookedaroundthe
roomateveryonewhowasthere
tocelebratewithherandthought
againhowspecialanoccasionit is.
Herfatherwaspracticallyburst-
ingwithprideashepointedoutall
thethingshelovedabouthisfirst-
bornchildandwhyhethoughtshe’s
sospecial.
Hetoldusofhisdreamsforher
andashespokeI thoughtofwhat’s
stillaheadforher.There’ssomuch
hope,somuchpromise,somuchto
experiencestill.
Hergenerationissodifferentto
mineandI wonderedhowshe’llex-
periencethethingsthatawaither.
Whetherit’sworkorstudyingor
findinglove– it willbenothinglike
thedayswithoutsocialmediaand
always-ondigitaldistraction.
Buthowexcitingitistobe 21
yearsold,onthethresholdofadult-
hood,withsomuchstilltolearn
andlookforwardto.
I hopesheenjoyseveryminuteof
theride.WINNING
LETTER
‘To all those who
left their warm homes,
we really appreciate
what you did’YOU subscribes to the SA Press Code, committing us to
journalism that’s true, accurate, fair and balanced. If you feel
we don’t comply, call the Press Ombudsman on 011-484-
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Letters should be no longer than 200 words. Opinions expressed here aren’t necessarily
those of YOU’s editorial team. We can’t undertake to reply to all letters. The sender of the
winning letter receives R300.system allow defaulters so much leeway?
Despite expensive court orders and
agree ments put into place to ensure fair-
ness when parents divorce, many single
parents struggle to get their exes to pay
their contribution towards the children’s
living expenses.
Many single parents simply just can’t
afford further costly legal processes or to
repeatedly take time off work to go to the
maintenance court. If they could do this,
they probably don’t need the mainte-
nance money. Many parents eventually
just stop trying to get the money owing
to their children. Sadly the kids involved
are the ones who suffer most.
I salute the many men and women
who put their issues aside and honour
their obligations to their children! You’ll
be rewarded for doing the right thing.
SINGLE MOM, EMAILFARAWAY AND YET SO NEAR
Life has a habit of making you meet peo-
ple you hopelessly fall in love with then
throw them far away across oceans and
mountains.
I was told long-distance relationships
never work. But every day, good or bad,
my faraway partner’s name comes to
mind. Geographically we’re poles apart
due to work but we still laugh at the
same jokes, tag each other in posts and
share our sad and happy moments.
I hate it when my phone beeps and it’s
not him. I’ve learnt that distance doesn’t
tear people apart, it’s the choices they
make that kill the relationship. I miss
him and waking up next to him. Even
when I’m a mess, coughing and sneezing,A
painthesleepTNIGHTmorningWhenbecausehehehecouldngotofd stareuptheint
atwonderbeing punished.himseMany teenagers are ngf inwhythemirrorhewas
selfbya fewDuanacneconsciousmonthsStroebelthatbloodagos caseabouthisandfacetheirwaspusdifferentwaspimpleswouldsoravagedoozebutjustfromthatoldThehesuffersitraresankchronfromintomadec conditiona serioush s lifedepressiontheso (^15) hellishyear
butscarsTheseI triednothingandalldayssignstheworkeddespavailableoftethestherarell havingsaysnodulocystskinproductsvisiblec
acnecasyouL keonaln the(seemostp mplebox)eyeteenagersheovercanconfidentlythehed hadyearsthebutlookocthe
acneMpumalangamovedn a differentthatfromflaredleagueinLydenburgDecemberupaftertolasthisBarbertonyearfamwasly
NatashatwocouldEventownsvethoughbeen(39)isjusttriggeredtheinitiallydistance130kmbysuspectedbetweenhisthemotherchangetheit
ofclBarbertonmateis muchhotterthanLyden
burgworsetoSheYOUAndwassheata localthenatsaysheritrestaurantasjust got worse and shewitands endDuanWithinchat
house witha monthand sister, TwanéintohissheofNatashaarrlvingrefusing(13)DuanhisdadhadtoretreatedleaveJohn(49)the
addsIt wasI wasAtonea darkpoembarrassednttimehetoldNatashaformethemhehesays
doesnususDuanHeshamet wantwantsalsoshetotodidnavoidsayseatt wantoutcausingwthto
gototobeforemeoutlivethatl fewithIt wastomytheh s frheartbreakingteenagefulendssonlikewasnt able
D
UANworldageruntilwasupsandeacnedownordinaryturnedteenhis
opedspreadingsaysButI reallyasfromthelikeacnehistocystsfaceswimdeveltohishe
outshouldersrealiseTheyofthethatthoughtandpoolh s schoolmateswheneverbackhehehadwashea contagarrivedhorrifiedwouldgetousto
stoppedd seaseNatashaswimmingsaysbecauseEventuallyofthewayhe
tionalthe kids were treating him.”HisDuanconditionandI wouldalsofightmadea lot,” Natasha him emo-
recaappearancestubbornwithserlsI wantedouslikedepressionandanyI fetoteenagerhelpt helpless.” because of his himHe struggled but he was
DuansaysrejectthattheI mhisonehimluckyclosesilvertofriendshaveliningfrdidnendswast
whorallTheIt wasedacceptschoolaroundabsolutelyandauthorithimsupportwonderesmealso
CoruisschooltoGrobelaarsponsorfulOneNatashahisofskinarrangedDuanrecallsproductss teachersforthe
pingoneNatashaI wasdaycentrewhenstandingsaystheytheinwereturningtheatqueuea localpointshopcameinthe
pharmacytappedwasSheandaskedmewhetherwhenonmethea womanwhatshoulderhed beenDuanI didnburnts problemt knowWhen
shePrivateDrNatashaEdwardheardHospitalit wasanBerryadminacneinofMbombelaBusamedshestrativereferredassistantLowveldmeto
tologintiastly d dnbecauset wantshetowasnphonet surethedermasheand
John, who works for a security company, would be able to afford expensive spe-cialist treatment.
week she discovered an appointment had already been made for Duan. “It was the woman from the pharmacy. But when she called the following
She was a good friend of the doctor.” and said it was the worst case of cystic They consulted Dr Berry in March. “He was shocked by Duan’s condition
antibacnethenDrBerryperformedheoticsd everandgaveseena coursesurgeryDuanfourtoofremovecortisonecoursestheof
worstcosmeticNatashaItwouldofthetellsprocedureacneveuscostAndusnearlyourbecausemedicalR25 (^000) it s aaid
wouldnDrgoItngBerrywastot havechargea hugesaidpahethemrelied fow
to3%fulThatgestureofhelpSouthwasbecauseHea wondeAfricanswanteonly
havemaket onItands aa differenceDuanfewhes condiwantsmonthsto
arecystslatera thingI neverandonDuantheofrealisedtheoozinpasts faI
getI d lookHeButs nowhelphelikeDuantakingstil hasthata longforsaysspecialthroadmedicationtorecoveryyto
getplainsweHeseeh s acnell betheThereondoctorunders alsoit foragaincontrolthreea chancemonthsNatashahell needbeforeex
buttoDuanI lookhavehedoesnplasticforwards stll ont dreadsurgeryholidaytogoreturnforngwhenthebackngtoscarsbecauseweschoolchat
I nowihopeHel causelongerhopestootherembarrassmenthavehteenss experiencetoworrythatDuanwillmysaysacneoffer
HelpjustMytois availablehangadvicen theretoanyoneDonn myt givepositionuphopes
HOWSkinthattheskinmakeITporesFORMSButsebumcontaindurngansebaceoustheoilteenthatlubricatesyearsglandshor
andmonesthcans cancauseresumoret incloggedoiltobeporesreleased
oggedulgesteheadswhenandouta poreThesefromclos
Pimplesthea poretopgetssurfaceThesecloggeddarkensformbutwheny appearstaystheopenporewhenandis
openItresultsallowinginswebacterialingandunderrednesstheskinor
acnecanCystscauseTheseThebodythemares reactiontoporesf ll wthatthtopusthegetbacteriaclogged
pimplesHOWdeepTOwithinandTREATthecanskACNEbenpainfulTheyrebiggerthan
AllSurethafromformsCapeKannenberg, a dermatologist ofTownacne require treatment, Dr explains.
moreandproblemProductswhiteheads but if pimples are the effectiveyoucontaining salicylic acid are should find a facewash for treating blackheads
thata dermatologistspecialistIf thecontainsproblemtreatment is needed. benzoyl peroxide.persists you should see In cases such as Duan’s
thanKannenbergtheirDuanlaterkidss casetreatedIt s easiersaysoffersforParentsacnetoa valuabletreatsoonershouldacnelessonratherathavean
earlydamagedstageselfthanesteemedtreatingSscarsanda
‘I’mtohavelucky
friendssupportacceptwhoandme’
DuanduringskinStroebelhisgraftingsessionf rst
LEFTthestartedt eatmentThebeforeacnewithhe
r itf whenasnt
r
gccould
he resI thoutofmylifeght
esgetsbutWhiormclobu
‘I thought BlackheadsthesknThey
I’dthatlookforlikethe
restlife’ofmy
It becamedidnt wantsotobadleaveDuanthe
housea doctor– thenwhoheknewfoundhow
toof the skin conditiontreatthisrarestform
BYPICTURES: JACQUES MYBURGH FANI MAHUNTSI
MY
ACNE
HELL
Abouttypesa dermatologistacneandsayseightit’sDroutl kelySurethaoffromto0 teensbeCapeoneKannenbergofsufferTownthreefrom
SSheadsblackheadsInflammatoryComedogenicandblackheadsandredacneacneandcausesconsyellowstswhofpimplesteheadswhite
Sbut with large lumps and cysts forming under the skin. “This is the type Duan suffers from. It’s the rarest type of acne Nodulocysticacneisinflammatoryacne
and is caused by hormones.”
TEENNEEDACNE:TOKNOWWHATYOU
Duan’s mom, says she felt Natasha, helpless
when her suffering.son was
18 |
YOUNEWS
4 | 8 AUGUST 2019 you.co.za^
YOU SAY