Women’s Health USA – September 2019

CI

G^

HA

RV

ER

Y

1

You’d never spend time with anyone

who makes you feel crappy, right?

Well, in theory. “I see clients fall into

friendships that don’t serve them all

the time,” says Megan Bruneau, a

therapist and executive coach in New

York City. “These people might seem

fun and nice at first, but they eventu-

ally become an energy suck. You feel

exhausted, insecure, or anxious dur-

ing or after your hangout, or you feel

like you’re always walking on egg-

shells.” A “friend” can also begin to

fall into the toxic category if you find

yourself confused by their behavior,

or you’re giving more than you’re re-

ceiving. But we get it: The guilt is real.

If you really value the friendship,

try voicing how you feel. Use “I”

statements so you don’t sound

Negative Friends

blame -y: “I feel X when you do Y, and

it would really help me if you could

try Z instead.” Still no change? Time

to part ways.

First, accept that you might not be

able to separate amicably, since you

can’t control their reaction, says Bru-

neau. If you want to block them on all

forms of communication, do so

(in the name of your mental health).

And if you can’t create physical

boundaries—maybe you work

together or have mutual friends—

“phase them out of your emotional

circle by not sharing any vulnerable

information with them anymore.”

Do

es^ t

his

sp

ark

joy

?^

Wh

en^

in^ d

oub

t,^ t

alk

—

the

n^ c

ut—

it^ o

ut.

Trademarks owned by Société des Produits Nestlé S.A., Vevey, Switzerland.