ebb and flow. About 14% of respondents acknowledged that their feelings about their body are complicated. We hear that!
IN 2008, ON MY 20th birthday, I made a
decision that would change my life forever:
to lose weight. It was something I had at-
tempted many times before—specifically, by
eating low-cal cereal bars twice a day for a
few weeks, only to eventually stop. At 185
p ou nd s a nd a si z e 18 i n pa nt s, it wa s l i ke a
switch flipped in my head. Once I decided to
lose weight then, there was no turning back.
I ended up dropping about 80 pounds
over the course of two years (thank you, cal-
orie counting, for teaching me portion con-
trol, and my hometown gym, for being a safe
space for treadmill workouts). I went from
walking around in a body that I felt was on
display to living in a body that felt...average.
And I was happy about that. I can say, with-
out a doubt, that I would not be who I am
today without the change. But now, more
than a decade later, I’m not sure I’d be able
to m a ke t he sa me de c i sion I m ade 11 ye a r s
ago—or if I’d feel comfortable enough to.
On Instagram, the hashtag #BodyPositive
has more than 10 million posts—all of which
are, in some form, telling people to love their
b o d ie s t he way t hey a re. It ’s a n awe somesentiment, but unfortunately, it’s not always
realistic. Here’s the reality: In a given year,
about half of all Americans are attempting to
lose weig ht. O f t hose t r y i ng to d rop p ou nd s,
about 56 percent are women.
Ba sic a l ly: Pe ople wa nt to lose weig ht for a
host of reasons. But the well-intentioned move-
ments can make you feel as if there’s something
wrong with you if you do wa nt to m a ke a
change—for health or appearance (or both!).
It ’s not ju st my p er sona l opi n ion; re se a rch
backs me up. For someone who needs help in
the self-esteem department, the constant re-
minders (to, say, love every i nch of you r b o dy)
m ig ht ac t ua l ly do more ha r m t ha n go o d ,
according to a study in Psychological Science.
When rah-rah affirmations compete with a
negative self-view, it can lead to more bad or
critical thoughts, say experts. The bottom line:
Forcing yourself to love your body won’t cut it.
So I propose a different idea: body autono-
my. Or, a person’s right to do what she or he
chooses with their body, without having to face
judgment. If someone loves their body as is,
g re at—we shou ld a l l be so luck y. But i f t hey fe el
the need to lose (or gain!) weight, for whatever
motive, can’t we chill and let them do them?
Losing weight was the best choice I ever
made for my body and my mind. I can run a
mile (at a 7:30 pace, thankyouverymuch), and
I’m more c on fident i n my opi n ion s now t hat
I feel more comfortable in my own skin. Do I
love my body unconditionally now? No. But
I like it more, and I was able to take ownership
of it on my ter m s. Ult i m ately, t hat ’s a l l I wa nt
for others too: the freedom to own their bod-
ies, and the ability to change—or not—at their
own discretion, minus any shame or guilt.How About Body
Autonomy?
Health editor Amber Brenza has
a proposal: If someone wants to lose
weight (or not), let them.WAKE-UP CALL The Moment You Realize You’re in Good Company
“Every morning, I stare at my naked body in the mirror to analyze what I’m work-
ing with that day. For years, I chalked up my habit of self-criticism to my fluctuat-
ing weight—a by-product of a hormonal disorder coupled with a bloat-prone
stomach. No matter how much I practiced loving my body, I couldn’t help but be
frustrated with its continual metamorphosis. Then, for a wedding, I shared a
room with my fittest friend. As we were zipping up the dresses we’d tried on for
each other so confidently the day before, she said, “Ugh, this is unflattering now.”
What?! She had the same mental shifts about her body that I did. That’s when
I realized that the relationship and the convos we have with our bodies are
part of a natural fluidity we all experience. Digesting that truth bomb made me
appreciate my own body even more.” —MARISSA GAINSBURG, FEATURES DIRECTOR
{BODY POV}