Elle UK – September 2019

261

GRAND DESIGN

Dine at La Maison

1888 (left), then

relax on the terrace

(below right)

ECOCHIC

Stayina

bungalowin

BlackH’mong

village,SaPa

ELLEExplore

that all changed last year when Mum came from

our family home in Merseyside to London, where

I now live, to take me out to dinner. As we cracked

open a second bottle of wine, we talked about the

expectations that society places on our respective

generations. For me, that means I should be thinking

about settling down and saving up for a house. For Mum, now 57,

it’s often assumed all that is left is retirement. So, there and then, we

decided we weren’t going to let other people dictate how we lived our

lives. In keeping with family tradition, it was time for a new adventure.

A month later, we’d booked a 12- day backpacking trip to Vietnam.

We were drawn to Southeast Asia, as neither of us had been, and we

wanted to share a new experience together. Vietnam ticked all the

boxes: it’s big on culture, it’s cheap enough to do a mix of fancy and

budget hotels, and we both love Vietnamese food. We were to start

in Ho Chi Minh City, fly up the coast to Hoi An and Da Nang; take

a one-hour flight to Hanoi, the capital, enjoy a night’s boat ride in Ha

Long Bay, and end our adventure with the trek in rural Sa Pa.

I admit, I had my reser vations. In the past five years, I hadn’t spent

more than a week with Mum. What if we had nothing to talk about?

t’saroundmidnightonour lastnightin Vietnam.Mymumand

I crawlintobedinsideourbamboobungalowandswitchoff

thelight.Outside,coatedindarkness,sprawlsasweepofgreen

ricefieldsintheMuongHoaValley,northernVietnam.JustasI close

myeyes,thesoundofscufflingoutsidethebungalowpiercesthe

silence.‘What’sthat?’I whispertoMum,grabbingherhand.‘It’s

nothing,’shereplies,unconvincingly–anoticeablehintofhesitation

inhervoice.Momentslater,wearestandingonthebed;mymum

holdinga kettle,asI shinemyphonetowardsthedoorwithonehand,

whiletheothertightensitsgriparounda metalfork.Whetherweplan

toeatormaimour‘assailants’is yettobeseen.

Hoursbefore,wehadbeentrekkingthe1Okmherefromthepretty

buttourist-packedvillageofSaPa,around325km

northwestofHanoi,trudgingourwayalongwinding

paths,pastgrazingbuffaloes.Wewerewalking

alongsidea groupoflocalwomen,theBlackH’mong

dressedinindigo-dyedembroideredjacketsand

legwarmers,whocomewithyouthroughthefields

inthehopeyoumightbuybraceletsorscar vesat

theendoftheroute.Theyaren’tofficialguides,but

they’refriendlyandit’sa goodwaytosupportwomen

intheareaanddosomeinternationalbonding

Despitethebabiesstrappedontheirbacksand

thestickyheat,theH’mongwomennimblyhopped

from one muddy ridge to another as we tried to keep

up. I watched Mum holding hands with one, chatting away in simple

English about how we ended up in Vietnam, and felt a rush of pride.

My family has always been adventurous. When I was six, my parents,

my brother and I moved to Western Australia. My dad was a GP and

decided to take a sabbatical. My mum was a lipspeaking interpreter,

and she taught us the English curriculum from Monday to Wednesday,

then we went to the local school on Thursdays and Fridays. Weekends

involved car trips to the Outback, lying like sardines in the boot of our

Volvo at open-air cinemas, and daring each other to eat witchetty grubs.

Longer trips meant kayaking alongside a whale and its calf in the Indian

Ocean or swimming with sharks at the Great Barrier Reef. When it

comes to holidaying with my family, normal has never been an option.

As I reached my twenties (I’m 27 now), the desire to travel en famille

ebbed away in favour of adventures with friends and boyfriends. But

ELLE.COM/UK September 2O19

InterContinental Danang

InterContinental Danang

Eco

Palms

House

InterContinental Danang

“ WE WEREN’T

GOING to LET

PEOPLE DICTATE

HOW we LIVED

OUR LIVES. IT

WAS TIME FOR

an ADVENTURE ”

I