P
ositive psychology is the new mantra for leading
happy and fulfilling lives. Coined and propounded
by Dr. Martin Seligman, professor of psychology at
the University of Pennsylvania, positive psychology
focuses on positive events and influences in life, a person’s
strengths rather than weaknesses, and building the good in
life instead of repairing the bad. It’s a scientific discipline
and should not be confused with positive thinking, positive
affirmation or similar self-help mantras.
According to Dr. Martin Seligman, following
his PERMA model helps individuals achieve
psychological well-being and happiness.PERMA MODEL TO HAPPINESS
P — Positive Emotions. Develop
a mindset which focuses on positive
emotions such as joy, satisfaction,
pride, etc. This can be done through
mindfulness training and adopting an
attitude of gratitude. Writing a daily
journal of at least three things that
made you happy that day is a great way to
develop this mindset.
E — Engagement. Activities that fully engage
and fill us with positive emotions and elevate one’s sense
of well-being, and help us find calm, focus, and joy.
Choose a career, hobby, sports, or activity that attracts full
engagement.
R — (Positive) Relationships. Homo sapiens are social
creatures. Interact with people around you with an attitude
of adding value to their lives. Soon you will discover that
they are also adding value to your life.
M — Meaning. Wealth and fortune are not the only
determinants of success and happiness. Living a meaningful
life requires dedicating yourself to a vocation or cause
greater than earning money. Focus and introspect on how
the job you do every day helps others. This will give you asense of meaning and purpose to life.
A — Accomplishment. Dr. Seligman believes it’s difficult
to live a full life and attain true happiness unless you are
working towards improving yourself and achieve goals.
Celebrating the small victories in life such as winning
a contract, having your child win a race or helping an
underprivileged child, will enable you to experience a
feeling of accomplishment.POSITIVE PSYCHOLOGY FOR CHILDREN
You can incorporate the PERMA model into
your parenting style to raise confident and
happy children with strong emotional
intelligence.
As a starting point, focus on building
your child’s innate strengths instead of
focusing on improving her weaknesses.
Set high expectations and reward
her with praise if she achieves her
goals. But if she fails, don’t criticise her.
Instead give her constructive feedback
on ways and means to improve. All praise
or feedback should be authentic and specific
to the task at hand. For instance, instead of saying
“you are so intelligent,” its advisable to say “this math
exercise was difficult, but I’m glad you worked hard to solve
it”.
If your child confesses to getting into a fight in school or
stealing from a friend, listen in a non-judgmental way and
encourage her to make it up to the person she hurt.
By helping children focus on their strengths and
nurturing what is best within themselves to enhance their
experiences of love, work, and play,we can empower them
to become dependent on themselves rather than others.(Ahkil Sahani is managing director of the Mumbai-based Shahani
Group and chairman of Global Discovery Schools)Positive psychology focuses on the positive events and influences in life, an individual's strengths
rather than weaknesses, and building the good in life instead of repairing the badHelp your child succeed with
POSITIVE PSYCHOLOGY
NURTURING 21st CENTURY CHILDRENMIDDLE
YEARS
AKHIL SHAHANI