Daily Express - 08.08.2019

Daily Express Thursday, August 8, 2019 29

DX1ST

expressyourself

Edited by

MERNIE GILMORE

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FULL OF

ENERGY:

Nicola with

husband Will

and children

Otto and

Martha. Inset,

left, before her

weight loss

Picture: PAUL BULLER

NICOLA, 30, lives in Hathern,

Leicestershire, with her husband,

Will. Both are directors of a school

photography firm. They have two

children, Otto, five, and Martha,

three

O

N holiday in Greece

I felt hot and

uncomfortable in my

too-tight, size-20

dress. My husband

Will led our children

Otto and Martha, then three and

one, to the hotel concierge to ask

about hiring a car. The receptionist

gave me a concerned look.

“Will it be safe for you, being

pregnant?” she asked.

I wanted the ground to swallow

me up. For the rest of our trip,

whenever Will tried to take a

photo of me, I’d jump out of shot.

Afterwards, I felt sad. It was as

though I hadn’t even been there.

I’d lived with that feeling of not

wanting to be noticed all my life.

As a little girl I was always bigger

than my friends and felt

self-conscious.

Then when I was 18, I got

together with Will, who I’d known

since childhood. He loved me just

as I was and, suddenly, my size no

longer seemed to matter.

In 2012, I discovered that I was

pregnant with our first baby.

We were so happy. When I was

24 weeks pregnant, as a treat to

ourselves before our son came

along, we booked a holiday to Las

Vegas. But two days into our trip,

I realised I hadn’t felt our baby

kick. At a local clinic, I saw the

expression on the sonographer’s

face change to concern.

“I’m so sorry,” she said. “I can’t

detect a heartbeat.”

In that moment, our world fell

apart. We booked the next flight

home so I could be induced in

hospital. I gave birth to our baby

Mylo, knowing we would never

see him grow or hear his first word.

D

URING the weeks that

followed, family-size

chocolate bars and

whole packets of biscuits became a

way of comforting myself. I was

angry at my body for “failing” me,

too, and overeating was a way of

punishing it. I started to associate

my sudden weight gain with my

memory of Mylo. I was convinced

that if I lost the weight, our son

would somehow be forgotten.

Eight weeks later I fell pregnant

again. Although we were thrilled,

we were also terrified history

would repeat itself.

Thankfully, in August 2013, a

healthy baby boy was placed in my

arms. And although baby Otto

could never erase the pain of

losing Mylo, he did give us

something to smile about once

again. Still there was a part of my

heart that just wouldn’t heal.

To try to create something

positive out of our grief, Will and

I became involved in our local

branch of the stillbirth and

neonatal death charity, Sands.

That gave us the confidence to

create our own charity, Mylo’s

Fund, organising events to help

parents pay for headstones for

children they had lost. It was a

comfort to know we were making

a difference to grieving parents.

My mum gently tried to

encourage me to lose weight,

worried my health would be

affected long-term. As much as

I knew that

something had to

change, I wasn’t

ready. It was only

when Will and I got

engaged that I joined Slimming

World. I lost 3st for our Tuscan

wedding in June 2014. Soon

afterwards, I fell pregnant, and

again soothed my fears with crisps

and chocolate, not able to feel fully

excited about our new arrival until

Martha was born safe and healthy.

Looking after a newborn and a

toddler was exhausting, and I

knew my weight was making

things harder. I got out of breath

chasing Otto about in between

looking after his baby sister, and

struggled to get up off the floor.

In my mind I wasn’t the mother

my children deserved and, as the

weeks passed, I worried my

children were going to grow up

with an unhealthy and unhappy

mum. Then came the final straw

when we went on that holiday to

Greece. Just the thought of putting

on my swimming costume made

me anxious. “Are you coming,

Mummy?” Otto asked. “Maybe

tomorrow,” I answered. Back

home, sad that I wasn’t in any of

our holiday photos, I was ready for

action. I poured out my worries to

Will, telling him I wanted to join

Slimming World again. I was

nervous but in May 2017, I

received the warmest welcome as

I walked into my new group. As I

stood on the scales, weighing 17st

2½lbs finally something had

clicked in my mind.

By putting all my focus on

becoming a healthier mum and

creating a positive legacy for Mylo,

I found I could give up the biscuits.

I

NSTEAD, food became

something that nourished

me. I started the day with

porridge, had home-made soup for

lunch, and made simple changes to

our evening meals. We still had

chilli or spaghetti bolognese, just

cooked using lean beef mince and

low-calorie cooking spray.

And I never left the house

without throwing a satsuma or

apple into my handbag. Will was so

supportive about the change in our

eating habits, complimenting me

when I invented a new recipe. And

my family and friends were too.

As the numbers on the scales

started to drop, my confidence

levels rose. After I’d lost around

3st, we arranged a charity race

night at our village hall and, for

the first time, I stood up and

welcomed the guests myself. It felt

like a huge turning point – I’d

come to accept that I didn’t have

to be overweight to keep our son’s

memory alive.

I reached my 9st 13lb target in

July last year. Now that I have the

energy to be active, I love joining

in with any activity my kids want.

And being able to support other

grieving families with energy and

confidence means I can keep

growing the tremendous legacy

Mylo has created.

I feel like he’s watching over me

as I splash around at the pool with

Otto and Martha, spurring me on

to be the best mum I can be.

● Story taken from Slimming

World Magazine, on sale now.

To find your nearest group, visit

slimmingworld.co.uk or call 0344

897 8000.

Interview by

MICHELLE RAWLINS

Now I can be the mum

I always wanted to be

Losing more

than 7st

helped

NICOLA

HARDY find

happiness

following

heartbreak

and conquer

her problems

caused by

emotional

eating

eeeng

WWWo r

wwed

aafte

agai

Height:

5ft 4ins

Starting weight:

17st 2½lbs

Weight now:

9st 11½lbs

Total lost:

7st 5lb