SEPTEMBER 2019 RUNNERSWORLD.COM/UK 031HH RR
ILLUSTRATION: PIETARI POSTI
life in running involves different seasons – not just the
annual ones, I’m talking about the whole journey. Spring is
the beginning, the discovery of running. The sport is simple,
life-enhancing and readily available. For most of us this
segues into a glorious summer as we embrace improvement.
We want to run faster, and realise that the more we run, the
faster we get; and the faster we get, the more we want to
run. This uncomplicated relationship between endeavour
and reward propels us to hitherto unimagined feats: PBs,
even longer distances. It’s intoxicating. We are recalibrating our reality. There
are moments when we might think our summer will last forever –running will
be a process of ever-increasing speed and constant improvement.
Alas, no. Autumn comes – farewell to pace, the shedding of an old identity
and the forming of a new one. It is the season I am cresting. It will, I hope, be
a time for experimentation, longer distances, adventure races, quirky events
involving the drinking of alcohol, foreign trips. But for now, as has often been
the case recently, I am engaged in a fairly tiresome process of recovery. The last
year has been a saga of back problems and hernia complications, culminating in
the operation I described last month (possibly in a bit too much detail).
The advice for returning to running varied. Most experts prescribed caution
and some cross-training. The general idea was about a month before proper
running could be attempted. But 10 days in and I was struggling. Every day I’d
gingerly walk the dogs as runners sailed by. It’s amazing how many runners
you notice when you’re not one of them. The feeling was one of disconnection,
of missing out on half my life. ‘I’m not one of the walking people,’ I wanted to
cry. ‘I’m a runner. I run!’
I prowled the house like a moody wolf. The woods were calling me, but I
couldn’t enter. Compounding my torment was the fact that working on my
forthcoming book had sent me on a mission to find old running photos, in theTonky Talk
BY PAUL TONKINSONprocess of which I had unearthed
dusty running diaries. The most
bittersweet were from when I was
about 19, back from university in the
summer holidays. I wasn’t really
running much at this stage but was
still, it seems, shockingly fit. Here’s
an entry: ‘7 miles easy with hills,
middle mile in 5:35, felt good’. Two
days later: ‘14.5 miles cross-country- smooth/finished strong’.
I don’t keep a diary now, but if I
did, there would be few parallels. The
only way I’m doing a 5:35 mile in the
middle of a seven-miler now is if I
happen upon zombies, and 14.5 miles
cross-country would not be smooth.
Of course, this was the height of my
summer. The irony is that now, when
I want to give it full beans, I can’t.
Two weeks after the operation,
I crack. I have to run. It’s either that
or go mad. So I venture out onto the
Parkland Walk, a woodland path
linking Finsbury Park with Highgate
Woods. The area of the operation is
tender and it feels weaker. That’s the
thing with operations – you’ve been
cut. You’re better, but you feel you’ll
never be the same. It feels absurd that
I’m going to run but, bracing myself,
I do. Very short steps at first, stepping
as softly as possible. No pace at all,
I just need to move, wake myself up.
Runners pass me constantly. I’m off
to the side, it’s like I’ve hit the wall in
the marathon and am just plodding.
I’m jogging for two minutes, walking
for a bit and then off again. But I feel
back, so back. Off the pace, certainly;
tentative, yes, but my axis has tilted. I
am running now. I have crossed back
over – my body floods with relief.
From a distance I must look strange,
an extremely slow middle-aged man
jogging down the side of the path
giggling to himself, close to tears.
This, I think, is autumn.
‘I’M NOT ONE OF THE WALKING
PEOPLE. I’M A RUNNER. I RUN!’
Check out Paul and fellow comedian
Rob Deering’s running podcast, Running
Commentary – available on iTunes and
Acast. @RunComPodA
YOU KNOW...
...you’ve lost too
much sweat on
your run when you
take off your top
and it breaks....it’s time to do
something about
the hard skin on
your heels when
you find it can
be used to
grate parmesan
(how you came
to be doing this
is another – far
more worrying –
matter)....you should
reconsider those
compression
tights when you
pull them as far as
your knees and
feel the need for
a recovery meal.