Viz – September 2019

(Greg DeLong) #1
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Viz 288 September 2019. © Fulchester Industries/Dennis Publishing Ltd. Let’s
start with a bit of very sad news. One ofViz’s founding editors, and the man
behind Paul Whicker theTall Vicar and Rude Kid amongst much else, our mate Jim
“Biz” Brownlow died on July 13th. Love and best wishes from everyone here - and,
we’re sure, from our readers - to all Jim’s family and friends.We will now hold a
sentence’s silence.
“cough”. And now
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