home.AtleastI havea newkitchen
andtwonewbathrooms.
Sure,theymaypitchinbydoing
chores,butit’snotanequalshare.
Theymakemessesthataren’tcom-
pletelyeradicatedevenafterthey’ve
‘tidiedup’.
Andwhatdo I getin return?
EverydayI’mpriv ytowhat’snew
andexcitingoroldandboringin
theirlives.I gettoregularlymeet
andtalkwiththeirfriends.I learn
thelatesttricksandtipsforTwit-
terandInstagrambecauseI re-
ceiveon-demandtutorials.I get
anopportunitytounderstandand
connectwithmyyoungadultchil-
drenandtheirfriendsbecause,ifI
listen,I willhearwhat’simportant
tothem,whattheycareabout.I get
thechancetodiscussanddebate
thethingsthatmattertothemand
pontificateoccasionally(OK,regu-
larly)onwhat’simportanttome.
I don’tknoweverythingaboutmy
kids’livesandI don’twantto.We
givethemtheirspaceandtheygive
usours.
Aneighbour ofourswithvery
youngchildrenrecentlyexclaimed
thatitmustbeabsolutelyawesome
tohaveyour20-somethingchildren
stillwanttobea partofyourlifeand
haveyoubea partoftheirs.
I replied that it was indeed
absolutely awesome – just don’t tell
them.Thepennyfinallydroppedone
nightwhenI triedtoprovidesome
fatherlyadvicetomy25-year-old
daughter.Withherstrappingbrother
intowforprotection,shewasabout
tomeetanunknownyoungmanto
recoverhersmartphonelostthenight
beforeata downtownclub.I suggest-
edthata $20coffeegiftcardwouldbe
a nicewaytosaythankyou.
Shereplied,“Dad,areyoukidding!
That’ssomethinganadultwoulddo.”
I wasstunned.I thought 25 year
oldswere adults.HadI misseda
memo?ItwasthenthatI realised
thatsheandhersiblingsaresuffering
froma ratherstaunchrefusaltogrow
up.Mostoftheirfriendsareaff lict-
edbythesamecondition.If 60 isthe
new40,thenI guess 30 isthenewten!
Whendidthenaturalorderofthings
becomelivingwithyourparentsuntil
theyretireanddownsize?Sometimes
I thinkCherylandI aregoingtohave
tomoveoutandleavethembehind
instead of the otherwayaround.
ANDSOHEREWEARE,oneyearafter
theterriblydisruptiverenoandallof
ouradultchildren are still living at
READER’S DIGEST
FROMTHEGLOBEANDMAIL(AUGUST22,2018)©2018
HOWARD GASKIN. THEGLOBEANDMAIL.COMI THINK MYWIFE
ANDI ARE GOINGTO
HAVETO MOVE OUT
INSTEAD OFTHE
OTHER WAY AROUND84 Augus t 2019