Glimpse – July 2019

74 | GLIMPSE | JULY 2019

I

n my personal experience,

the few times I realized

I was in love because I

was in pain. I realized

that I was hurting because of her,

for whatever reason, and it was

because I was in love with her.

The pain isn't a result of her

trying to hurt me, but because

her actions, her words or the

situations she found herself in that

I witnessed made me feel hurt, I

had to accept that I deeply cared

about her. We know we are in

love when the other person can

hurt even without trying. People

always say you know you're in

love when a person makes you

happier than you thought you

could possibly be – and I believed

that to be true. However, being

in love and realizing that you've

just fallen in love are two different

things. Accepting that you are in

love is usually the most difficult

part. Unless of course, you're one

of those individuals who “falls

in love” biweekly. These sorts of

people don't count because they

don't understand what love truly

is.

For the rest of us who fall in

love, no more than a handful of

times, accepting that we are in love

can be difficult. It's much easier the

first time around, but the second,

third or fourth time can get much

harder. In fact, it gets more difficult

to accept you've fallen in love

each consecutive instance. Why?

Because definitely it didn't end

well in the last relationship. Even

if it ended well, the experience

itself was painful. No matter which

stage of a loving relationship

you consider, each stage brings

with it intense, and sometimes

overpowering, emotion.

Coming to accept that you've

fallen in love is always preceded

by pain, even if only by the pain of

wanting someone you don't have.

Being in love, with all the wanting,

needing, and missing, is a sort of

pain in its own regard. Assuming

we aren't too experienced

PAINFUL BUT

NECESSARY

I don’t believe it’s possible to love without feeling

pain. It’s not because love is pain, but because love is

always accompanied by pain. In fact, I’d go as far as to

say that love is necessarily preceded by pain.

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