take it. Are you okay with
only channelling your inner
actress or do you want to go
the whole nine yards with
costumes, props, et al?
Discover which ‘character’
you want to play.
“Certain characters add
a whole new dimension to
one’s personality. For
example, if in reality the man
is the dominating one in the
relationship, during roleplay
the woman could control
the act. This could lead to
a change in the sexual
dynamics between the
couple. If the woman can pull
off a dominating role in bed,
there is a possibility that she
has that streak in reality as
well. This gives the two
IN THIS DAY
AND AGE, MOST
COUPLES DEAL
WITH AMPLE
INSECURITIES.
ROLEPLAYING
CAN HELP DRIVE
THEM OUT.Throw some kink in the mix and get
adventurous between the sheetsa deeper understanding of
each other. In this day and
age, most couples deal with
ample insecurities.
Roleplaying can help drive
them out,” says counsellor
and psychotherapist
Parul Khona, Pune.Determine limits
Although you’re open to
experimenting with different
roles, it’s possible that certain
situations are a strict no-no.
“If either partner feels
uncomfortable in any
scenario, no matter what it is,
it means STOP. Have
a detailed discussion with
each other. It can go a long
way in preventing
complications,” says Dr Sathe.In case, either party is
hesitant to discuss, it is
advised that both go with the
flow, and then decide where
to draw the line. “Limits can
be specified at any moment
since thought processes and
consent can change during
the course of the sexual
encounter,” opines Khona.
Trisha Kapoor, a 35-year-
old IT professional from
Bangalore, shares, “When my
husband and I first started
roleplaying, I was
apprehensive because
I had heard from a friend
how terribly wrong it had
gone for her. She’d taken
part in a ‘boss-and-secretary’
scenario with her boyfriend,
and was stunned when he
entered her from behind
without consent. Later, he
claimed that he got ‘mixed
signals’ from her. Thus,
I made sure that my husband
and I took it slow, discussed
what we wanted and what
was off-limits, and, I must
admit, we had a great time.”
No judgement please! It’s
expected that your partner
and you may have a few
fantasies that are ‘unusual.’
For instance, you could get
turned on by gender-bender
roles or want to have wild sex
dressed as your favourite
cartoon characters;
workplace subterfuge where
you go down on each other
at faux workplace situations,
could also be part of your
list. If you have good
understanding with your
partner, there is no reason
why you should not give in to
your kinks. Judgement has
no role in the bedroom, so
never shame your partner for
his fantasies. “I’ve always
fantasised about having sex