Expat Living Singapore – July 2019

PARTING SHOT

160 JULY 2019

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That

ALOISE PRICE reflects on the

imminent departure from Singapore

of very dear friends.

The annually asked question “Are you staying or leaving?”

that permeates conversation at school gates came around

again in March, provoked by the deadlines of informing

schools whether children would be signing on for another

academic year, or vacating their places. And so, the

organising and packing begins, both the crating up of a

current life and the planning for the next one, either back

home or to somewhere entirely new.

In this whirlwind expat world we’ve chosen, it’s easy to

forget the speed with which life-changing decisions can be

made, and how quickly those plans forge ahead.

I remember dismantling our life in Mumbai after a

decade there and arriving in Vietnam with all the foreign

newness that involved. The first day of term arrived and we

were nearly late for school, because I’d not factored in how

early the day begins in Ho Chi Minh City. As we inched

our way along the freeway behind the mass of humanity

on mopeds, I marvelled at how completely different it was

compared to the sleeping city of Mumbai at that hour.

Standing at the gate at pick-up time later that same

day in January, feeling so very shy and alien to the

conversations surrounding me, I saw the stark contrast

to the welcoming party I’d been a proud member of after

a decade in one city. I vowed then that this was the last

time I wanted to embrace starting over in a new posting

and knowing nobody. It was the basis for our decision to

return to Singapore for the third time ten years ago, where

we still had friends and knew the way the city works.

From a personal perspective of those left behind, it’s a

reminder of the transitory nature of our lives and how very

comfortable we have become, with our lives intrinsically wound

together. Though distance will not affect all our friendships,

living in different time zones will make regular catch-ups more

challenging. While we have social media as a regular insight

into each other’s lives, the minutiae and intimacy of day to day

life has gone. And some years are tougher than others, with a

painful mass exodus at times.

It must be anathema to many who have not moved from

home, that we expats feel a belonging to so many different places

and hold loyalties to such a multitude of multicultural friends.

We are fragments of our experiences, and yet fragmented and

woven all into one life – the spirit is all.

Tim McGraw encompasses my feelings in a simple sentence:

“We all take different paths in life, but no matter where we go,

we take a little of each other everywhere.”

At times such as these, it’s helpful to remember that best

friends are still best friends, a plane ride away or not. And

whenever we do meet up, we’ll pick right up where we left off.

Because that’s what great mates do.

Year

of

PARTING SHOT

Time

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