While he wasn’t fond of my nal college option, (Probably too close to home at 250
miles away.) The other options were out of state. (Sounded good to him...) I chose the
in-state option anyway. Final decision! He approved later.
My daddy was the essential strong and silent type. He didn't take anything from
anyone...Anyone!
An Alpha male. He was strong in his convictions. He always voted. I don't think he ever
received a traf c ticket. He was never a penal system casualty, He had a very powerful
voice and he really loved the 'Language of Vulgarity' (Cussin'). I think he may have
invented a new cussin' word or two.
I witness my father wearing a frozen smile at his mother's funeral. I took a peek at him
in the front row to see if he was crying. He wasn't. It was hard for me to come to grips
that my father showing absolutely no solemn emotion that day.
My older brother number #2 and I sobbed like toddlers at my father's step-mother's
funeral. I'd seen my grandmother only twice in my life. But It didn't matter that day...
I reacted mostly from my brother's emotional reaction. It was a solemn day. I never
saw my brother show emotions, but he had a relationship with our grandmother. I did
not. I had only seen her twice as a child, but my emotions ran just as intense as his.
Eight years later, I would mirror dad's frozen smile throughout his funeral services. I
assumed that was the benchmark based on my dad's reaction at his mother's funeral.
His was only the second funeral I ever attended. I knew of no funeral etiquette.
It really did hurt that day. Man, it really hurt to smile through that solemn morning.
I held steadfast at my daddy's funeral. I was commended by my friends and family for
doing so, however, the very next day after, I could not hold back my emotions.
The outbreak occurred during my family's only heated post-funeral episode. A
discussion was brought up concerning buying our mother's burial plot next to my
fathers' plot. Very inappropriate at the time. Hell, she outlived most of whom was
there, including the person who initiated the conversation.
Anyway, maybe my dad went through a similar experience with his family. I'll never
know.