“Jenson is eight years
old and has been
there for me through
all the tears, tests,
and heartache. He
made me smile and
snuggled up with
me when I couldn’t
smile. Now, he’s the best ever big brother
to Jesse. I couldn’t have asked for a better
companion on the most dii cult journey.”
Ashley and Jenson, Norfolk.“Kevin the dog
has saved us. After
several failed
attempts at IVF, we
were both sad, angry,
confused, and fed
up. Someone told
us to get a dog. I’ve
never had a dog, but I’m so glad we did,
because you cannot be sad with a dog;
they instantly make you feel loved and
they love you with all their heart. Having
Kevin has given us a purpose in life; we are
a mum and dad and this little dog relies on
us. He makes us get up in the morning.”
Kara and Kevin, Kent.“Kenny isn’t the
baby we have waited
for since we i rst
started trying to get
pregnant six years
ago, but he has
brought so much joy
to us over the last few
months. He gives me
a sense of purpose, other than focusing on
fertility treatment. It’s so joyful watching
him grow, develop, and change from
a little puppy into a boisterous one!
We are unsure what our next steps towards
having a baby will be at the moment, but,
whatever happens, Kenny has brought
us happiness in the darkest of hours. It’s
hard to remember what life was like before
he arrived!”
Carly and Kenny, Essex.“Our Westie, Crumpet, has been a constant
source of companionship through our
infertility and
baby loss journey.
A reminder for us
to get outside, and
appreciate the simple
things in life, when
everything seems
so tough.”
Sophie Martin and
Crumpet, Essex.60 Your Dog March 2020everyone; Leo got lots of fuss, we could
go to the clinic without worrying, and
our friends felt they were helping in
a small way.
Then of course, there is the exercise.
I’m not going to pretend that a daily walk
is the answer to making IVF work, but
there’s no doubt that getting out into
the fresh air is good
for your mental
well-being. Because of
some of the IVF drugs
I was on, it was actually
suggested that I go
for a brisk 20-minute
walk after taking them,
and I always had
a willing volunteer
to accompany me
on my ‘marches’ as
I called them.
I’ll admit there was a downside to
having a puppy that I hadn’t anticipated.
It gave me a taste of what being a family
was like. I loved mothering Leo, caring
for him and watching him thrive, and
feeling proud at what a lovely dog he was
growing into. The unconditional love he
gave us, and the joint purpose it gave me
and my husband was undoubtedly a good
thing, but it also made me realise, more
than ever, what I was missing out on by
not being a mum.
Sadly, statistics aren’t on
your side when it comes
to IVF. According to the
NHS, only 29 per cent of
cycles work for women
under 35, with success
rates reducing the older
you get. Even knowing
the odds are against you,
it is devastating when it
doesn’t work, and this is
when having Leo probably
helped me the most. We
had two failed cycles and
there were days when
I just wanted to stay in bed
and not face the world.
But Leo could always makeme smile, bringing me his favourite toy
chicken, or cuddling up beside me, and
he forced me to literally keep putting one
foot in front of the other because whether
I wanted to go or not, he needed feeding
and a walk.
Luckily for us, three was the magic
number, and I’m very happy and grateful
to say that I’m currently
pregnant — with
twins! They’re due in
a few weeks’ time and
as I write this Leo is
currently snuggled up
to my bump having
a snooze. I’m making
sure I take the chance
to give him extra
cuddles while I’ve got
the time, and often
whisper a thanks for getting us through
the last 18 months.
When we tell people our good news,
after congratulating us, the next comment
is often: ‘What will Leo think of it?’, and,
of course, we don’t know what’s going
to happen. But I suspect that he’ll be an
excellent big brother, and we’ve got
a long list of people willing to dog sit if he
needs a break. And as for how we’ll cope
with two newborn babies, well we’ve had
a puppy so it’ll be easy peasy — right?“There was
a downside to
having a puppy
that I hadn’t
anticipated.”
Gwenda Burns, chief executive of leading patient charity Fertility Network
UK, said: “According to our 2016 survey ‘The Impact Of Fertility Problems’, in
collaboration with Middlesex University, respondents felt on average sad,
frustrated, and worried nearly all of the time due to their fertility issues. Dealing
with your mental health, while facing fertility challenges, can be a tricky road.
Each of us has dif erent methods of self-care that can help us through the day.
Whatever you do to aid you through your journey, whether that be relaxing,
walking, or getting a l uf y friend, Fertility Network is an advocate of always
being kind to yourself.”pgd
.Jenson.Kevin.Kenny.Crumpet.y y yyFACING FERTILITY CHALLENGES
Leo with Hannah and her
husband, Ian, on Leo’s i rst
day at his new home.
Image: Ian Olsson.58-60 YD IVF Mar20 CS(MH)(SW) OK.indd 60 23/01/2020 10:27