Autocar UK – 31 July 2019

Wherever you start, travelling to the

centre of Australia means thousands

of broken white lines, millions of

kamikaze insects and enough dust

to induce serious respiratory issues.

If you positioned yourself in Europe,

you could cross five countries in

the same distance it takes you to

get from Australia’s coastline to its

parched red centre, albeit without the

toll roads, arrogant French drivers

and roadside caffeine hits.

Not that finding the centre is an

easy task. Most travellers head to

Lambert Centre, the result of a 1988

bicentennial project to locate the

gravitational centre of the country’s

7,692,024 square kilometres. It even

has its own road (if you can call it

that), as well as an obligatory plaque

and a scale replica of the flagpole on

top of Parliament House. Some long-

drop dunnies make a change from

squatting over red dirt.

But prior to 1988 Lambert Centre

was not on the map. Literally. The

centre was somewhere else. Or, to be

m o r e p r e c i s e , fo u r p l a ce s e l s e.

At least five methods have been

used to calculate the centre of

Australia over more than a century.

They look close enough on a map but

are splayed across

an area about the size of Ireland.

Each is calculated using different

methods. One places 50,000 equally

weighted points around the mainland

Australian border to calculate the

point at which a hypothetical cut-out

would balance perfectly.

Another is the centre of the largest

circle that can be drawn in Australia,

while the median point plucks the

intersection of the mid-point of the

longitude and latitude extremes of

the country.

Then there’s the boldly named

Johnston Geodetic Station, set up by

the Division of National Mapping as a

central reference point.

Don’t get too excited about

visiting those centres, though. All but

Lambert Centre are on leasehold land

so require a call to the station owner

to ask permission. And you’re pretty

much guaranteed a puncture, like

the one we copped on relatively high-

speed dirt. Fortunately the full-size

spare ensures little lost progress.

There’s also one giant caveat

with searching for the centre point

of Australia, the final words left to

Geoscience Australia. According

to the government body’s website:

“Officially, there is no centre of

Australia”. The reasoning?

“This is because there are many

complex but equally valid methods

that can determine possible

centres of a large, irregularly-

shaped area – especially one that

is curved by the earth’s surface.”

So if you must, head to the

easy-to-find Lambert Centre and

then call it a day (or week).

X MARKS THE SPOT(S)

MERCEDES X-CLASS DRIVE

3 1 JULY 2019 AUTOCAR.CO.UK 61

instead venturing into the Flinders

proper, renowned for its tough off-

road trails and sharp, tyre-stabbing

r o c k s. O u r X i s r u n n i n g on op t ion a l

19in rubber, the sort of thing unlikely

t o b e w it h i n 5 0 0k m of he r e shou ld w e

need a replacement.

Fortunately they’re holding up

well, a craggy creek crossing testing

the part-time four-wheel-drive

system and reaffirming the X-Class’s

off-road credentials.

Dips and cattle grids on higher-

speed sections take the suspension to

its limit, the solid rubber bump-stops

thwarting a metal-on-metal clash.

As we head west the sun is

persistently hovering above the

bonnet, the glowing backdrop

turning the oncoming dust trails

into almost total brown-outs. The

towering mountains of the Flinders

disappear in the rear-view mirror as

quickly as they appear, the vastness

of the outback on stark display.

We’re in a race against the clock

now, to beat both the sun and

the awakening ’roos, the latter a

medium-rare highlight on the Feral

Mixed Grill that is the signature

dish at the Prairie Hotel (other FMG

accompaniments include choice cuts

of emu and camel).

As we venture farther west the

roads improve, a final bitumen blast

i nt o Pa r a c h i l n a of fe r i n g s ome r e l ie f

from the rocks and dust.

With the sky turning pinky-

orange, kegs are unloaded. You can

almost hear the Merc’s rear springs

si g h a s e a c h k e g i s r e mo v e d , t he r u mp

slowly rising to match the altitude

of the nose. With the tray empty,

our X250d takes on a more natural

stance, its profile once again vaguely

in line with the horizon.

By now the sun has disappeared,

taking the f lies with it. A perfect

excuse for a celebratory beer – or two.

And a feast on the FMG. L

Mercedes has the

luxury pick-up

market all to itself

Lambert Centre is

one of Australia’s

several central points