AUGUST 2019 • 141READER’S DIGESTGROWING UP I ALWAYS THOUGHT
that I wanted to be a doctor. But now
I’m an adult, I realise I really wanted
to be a doctor in the 1800s.
Got the flu? Chug of whiskey for
you, chug of whiskey for me!
SEEN ON REDDIT
SINCE MY KIDS WERE BORN,
I’ve been wearing jeans from Marks
& Spencer.
They’re in a style called “relaxed
skinny”—ironically two things I
haven’t been since my kids were
born. COMEDIAN LUCY PORTER
I USUALLY MEET MY GIRLFRIEND
at 12.59, because I like that one to
one time. COMEDIAN TOM WARD
PEOPLE SAY I’VE GOT NO WILL
power, but I’ve quit smoking loads of
times! COMEDIAN KAI HUMPHRIES
CONJUNCTIVITIS.COM. Now that’s a
site for sore eyes. COMEDIAN TIM VINE
OF COURSE FOREIGNERS MIGHT
steal your job. But maybe if
somebody without contacts, money
or the ability to speak the language
steals your job... you weren’t very
good at your job! SEEN ONLINETHE SPICE GIRLS SHOWED US
that even when women are given
a chance to tell us what they want,
what they really, really want... they
will still often say nonsense.
COMEDIAN SPARK TABOREARLIER THIS YEAR I GOT ROUND
to watching The Theory of
Everything—loved it.
Should have been called Look
Who’s Hawking, though. That’s my
only criticism.
COMEDIAN JAMES ACASTERI FIND THAT ANTS OVER-PRAISE
me. Sycophants? Yes I am.
COMEDIAN TIM VINEMY CHILDHOOD DOCTOR WAS
really rather a large man.
He looked like the only thing he’d
ever cured was pork.
COMEDIAN TIM VINE