43
Not long after Cindy moved to
Amsterdam, Eric’s older sister
got a new job in Texas. It was
evident how much Judy missed
her daughters.
One day, she said, “What was
that thing I can get on my
phone that will help me talk to
Cindy for free? I’m missing out
on too much. I need to be more
connected.”
I could hardly believe it. The
very thing I’d prayed for!
Another of Eric’s sisters
bought Judy a less complicated smart-
phone. Eric downloaded the WhatsApp
messaging app for her. Moments later
she was talking to Cindy, the reception
crystal clear. Judy couldn’t stop smiling.
When the call was over, Eric showed
her how she could text using the app
and even video-chat. At first, she used
it only if one of us was there to help her.
Then one day I took her to lunch.
“One of my friends uses WhatsApp,”
she said. “She texts her grandkids with
it. I think I might like to do that too.”
“That’s great,” I said, resisting the
urge to push further. In God’s time, I re-
minded myself. Judy had grown more
active socially too, joining a Bible study
and going to lunch with friends.
A few days later, my phone pinged
with a text. “Hi,” it read. Judy!
“You sent me a text,” I typed back.
“I sent one to everyone in my contact
list!” Nothing could hold Judy back af-
ter that. With the press of a key, she
had someone to pass the time with—a
connection that didn’t replace a face-
to-face meeting yet offered an intimacy
all its own.
Soon Judy wanted to tackle the lap-
top computer we kids had bought her
for Christmas several years before.
“There’s this pastor I like,” she said.
“He sends out newsletters on e-mail.
I’d like to subscribe.”
Eric set up an e-mail address for her
and showed her how to find the pastor’s
website. On her own, Judy e-mailed a
contractor about a home improvement
project. A granddaughter taught her
how to look for recipes on Pinterest.
She’s excited to learn how to shop online.
But her first love is still messaging.
Staying in the loop with children and
grandchildren, friends from church.
Laughing at jokes. Sharing recipes.
Extending birthday greetings or con-
gratulations on a good report card.
Sometimes it feels as if Judy is more in
the loop than I am. And today when I
visit her—still without knocking—I see
a different woman. Happier. No longer
lonely. She’s back in her real bedroom,
and the box of photos has been re-
turned to a shelf in the basement. (Her
old Bible is still front and center.)
Loneliness is one of our society’s
greatest problems. And when your
family member is suffering, the prob-
lem really hits home. Yet all my at-
tempts to make Judy change failed.
Only God could do that.
Our immediate solution was the tech-
nology we’ve all come to depend on. But
the real breakthrough was helping my
mother-in-law reconnect with her fam-
ily and friends, with her life.LIVING LONGER, LIVING BETTER