Essentials South Africa – August 2019

Find tHe

‘doing notHing’

tHat suits you

We can be divided into three

personality types: the Mind type, who

lives in their head and needs mental

distraction to help them switch off; the

Heart type, who is attuned to their

feelings; and the Body type, who

focuses on what their bodies are trying

to tell them. We all have some of these

traits, but one will dominate.

 Mind type: Distract yourself by

replacing your thoughts with other

ideas, whether reading, listening to

an audiobook or the radio, or doing

a puzzle or crossword.

 Heart type: Pick the people

you need around to help you relax.

Maybe it’s as simple as sharing a

coffee and chatting or, if there’s no

one around, just enjoy daydreaming

about those you love.

 Body type: Going for a walk

or doing some relaxation exercises,

where you are consciously squeezing

and relaxing each muscle in your body,

works best to help you unwind.

d

oes everyone tell you

you’re too busy? People

around us often see things

before we do, so if your

loved ones are telling you

things like, ‘You’re wearing yourself

thin’ or ‘i never see you any more’,

it’s a sure sign that your routine needs

a major overhaul. don’t dismiss their

comments. A good starting point for

change is to take a day for

yourself and go somewhere

peaceful to assess your time

and life priorities, but don’t

be too hard on yourself:

change doesn’t happen

overnight. Follow our tips

to get the time you need

to make your life feel

more balanced...

you’ve earned tHis

If the idea of doing nothing sounds like

pure bliss yet never seems to happen,

then ask yourself why you can’t switch

off without feeling you should be doing

something else? Setting goals is fine, but

getting too used to pushing yourself can

mean feeling bad about taking it easy.

All this leads to a ‘hurry sickness’ where

you equate chilling out with being lazy

and selfish.

trY tHiS Book in a regular slot of ‘doing

nothing time’ each week. Not only will

you be better company and perform

better at work, you’ll also be infinitely

less stressed. ‘Idle time’ changes the

brain’s chemistry, increasing the feel-

good hormone serotonin and leaving

you calmer and more in control.

silence tHe cHatter

You’ve promised yourself some down

time at home, so why do random worries

keep entering your head and spoiling the

moment? Often, before we can switch off,

we need to clear our minds of any niggles.

trY tHiS Instead of battling your

worries, allow yourself 10 minutes to

brainstorm solutions to the problem.

Grab a pen and paper to jot down ideas.

Ask yourself: what have I tried? Have

I been in this situation before? How did

I cope then? Right, 10 minutes are up,

now let the guilt-free idle time begin...

If a problem still keeps popping into your

head during your ‘off time’, you’re more

likely to come up with a solution

anyway, as you’re allowing your

thoughts to flow in a calmer way. When

we try to do too many things at once,

the problem-solving part of the brain

shuts down. It’s amazing how, once we

slow down, the answer comes to us.

enjoy a Fantasy

To help relax, play classical

music and try imagining

a beautiful scene from a

holiday or a fantasy of

yourself in the future. How?

Simply picture walking into

a room where every single

thing, from the door to the

furniture, is painted in your

favourite colour.

trY tHiS Pale purple or light blue are

particularly healing, whereas orange

will energise rather than relax you.

BanisH moods

At first, when you start trying to empty

your mind of the everyday, you might

find feelings of restlessness or anxiety

creeping in. It’s tempting to plunge

back into busyness to dispel this, but

a simple breathing exercise is a much

better fix. Try 5-2-5 breathing... first

breathe out for a count of five, then

pause at the end of the breath for two

counts, before breathing back in for

five. This slows your heart rate and

gives your brain a chance to banish

the stresses of the day.

trY tHiS When your thoughts start

to stray, bring them back to your breath.

The fact that you are clearing your

mind will also recharge your batteries.

Fill your me-time

We each have a ‘time indulgence’ – a

lingering breakfast over the paper, or

getting stuck into a novel. Although it’s

easy to sideline these activities when

faced with more pressing issues, they

matter because they nourish us and

ensure we enjoy life.

trY tHiS Ask yourself, if you had

a whole day free, what would you do?

Make a list of activities, and be as

specific as possible – a croissant from

your favourite café, a massage, a movie

screening, or sending an email to a

your Life | smart ideas

Beat stress by

booking a

weekly ‘doing

nothing’ slot

friend. You don’t need to wait for an entire

free day to do any of those things. Do one

a day for the next few weeks and see if

your life is more joyful.

connect witH Friends

It’s ironic that the first relationships to go

when we’re busy are the ones we take for

granted, which tend to be those that are

actually most important to us. If you can’t

remember when you last had a proper

chat with your best friend, you need to

slow down and make time to reconnect

• you’ll be happier for it.
  trY tHiS Write down the 10 most
  important people in your life, and when
  you last spoke to them properly. Put it in
  your diary to catch up with each person


• and don’t use email to do it. Even if you
  end up leaving a voice note, just hearing
  a voice helps us stay connected.