The Guardian - 31.07.2019

Section:GDN 12 PaGe:3 Edition Date:190731 Edition:01 Zone: Sent at 30/7/2019 18:22 cYanmaGentaYellowbla

• The Guardian
  Wednesday 31 July 2019 33

Say

what?

A successful

search

and rescue

operation was

launched near

Botany Bay

off the coast

of Kent after a

father and his

two children

drifted out

to sea on an

infl atable

unicorn.

Two lifeboat

teams and a

coastguard

helicopter were

dispatched.

not only prim and pristine – we are

also the woman who wants to dance.

But the trend could reasonably be

viewed as a refl ection of the modern

unsettled nature of relationships.

Not only do we not marry and stay

married as we once did, we cohabit,

date around and date diff erent

genders. We Tinder, we Bumble

and we Hinge. We frolic among the

meadows of choice.

Increasingly, our exploration

of the many facets of ourselves

is not explored internally, but

rather aesthetically – through fast

fashion, cosmetic surgery, multiple

relationships and an array of

wedding dresses.

As Kierkegaard suggested,

perhaps we would do better, be

happier, if instead we learned to

rotate the crop of ourselves. After

all, as the fi nest Danish philosophers

knew, the best weddings aren’t

about changing in and out of fancy

frocks – rather they are for relishing

time with the one(s) we love.

Laura Barton

Should people

with no kids be

banned from

Disney World?

O

hmygod, you are never going to believe what Donald

Trump said on Twitter this morning! It sounded like

it was written by an extremely racist and unusually

stupid seven-year-old; nevertheless, it has already had

a million retweets and 15 gazillion replies, and inspired

approximately 10bn think pieces.

That, my friends, is what you call an evergreen story. Every single

day, the president of the US tweets bigoted and factually incorrect

nonsense, and every single day, his tweets seem to constitute 50% of

the news; we are stuck in a hellish groundhog day that rotates around

Trump’s verbal diarrhoea. Important issues get shoved to the sidelines

as we argue about whether Trump’s latest racist comment means he

is a racist (spoiler : yes), hypothesi se about what “ covfefe ” signifi es or

cackle over typos such as “ Prince of Whales ”.

On Sunday, Chris Murphy, a senator from Connecticut, tweeted that

he was unfollowing the president “because his feed is the most hate-

fi lled, racist, and demeaning of the 200+ I follow and it regularly ruins

my day to read it. So I’m just going to stop.” His announcement started

a small movement ; Twitter users began urging the president’s 62.4

million followers to emulate Murphy and #unfollowTrump.

While unfollowing Trump may seem like a tiny gesture, it is actually

a big deal. Size matters to Trump. He is obsessed with his ratings and

social media metrics. According to the Daily Beast , he frequently

complains about having fewer Twitter followers than Barack Obama

• who has 107.4 million. This has nothing to do with the fact he is less
  popular than Obama, of course; rather, the president has tweeted
  that Twitter is biased against conservatives and stops people from
  following his account ( this is nonsense ). Trump also reportedly
  spent a large portion of an April meeting with Jack Dorsey , Twitter’s
  founder, complaining that the platform limits his followers ( this,
  again, is nonsense ). If enough people unfollowed him, it would deal a
  huge blow to his fragile ego.
  I also think it is worth remembering that there is nothing positive
  to be gained by engaging with Trump on Twitter. A large number
  of people appear to labour under the delusion that retweeting the
  president and attaching a snarky comment constitutes an act of
  #resistance. It doesn’t. All publicity is good publicity for Trump. The
  same is true for Nigel Farage, who owes his high profi le to the media’s
  endless attention. In a recent cover interview
  for Campaign , an advertising trade magazine,
  Farage laughed about a New York Times headline
  calling him “the most dangerous man in Britain”.
  “I loved it,” he said. “I’d have paid for advertising
  like that.”
  It’s easy to feel helpless about the state of the
  world. But there are simple things that we can all
  be doing to take back control, and unfollowing
  Trump is one of them. Most of the world isn’t on
  Twitter, and when Trump’s tweets are elevated
  into mainstream news, we are helping spread his
  vile statements. We’re doing his work for him.
  We’re complicit.

Las Vegas is being overrun by swarms of grasshoppers;

there are so many of the chirpy little insects in the city

that they are registering as storms on weather radars.

The grasshoppers are not in Vegas to gamble, by the

way : the infestation is thanks to unusually wet weather.

These conditions have also led to a spike in stink bugs.

Locals are making the best of the biblical infestation

with various bars off ering grasshopper-themed drink

specials. As the old saying go es: when life gives you

swarms of insects, you might as well get wasted.

If you’re not a fan of unbridled

capitalism, brace yourself : I am

sorry to report that an EXTREMELY

EMPHATIC Facebook post is going

viral. The post in question is from an

anonymous mother who is outraged

people without kids have the

temerity to holiday at Disney World.

“It pisses me off TO NO END!!!!!

When I see CHILDLESS COUPLES

AT DISNEY WORLD,” she explains.

“DW is a FAMILY amusement park!!!!

Yet these IMMATURE millennials

THROW AWAY THEIR MONEY ON

USELESS CRAP!!!!!” The outburst

appears to have been prompted by

a woman “in some very SLUTTY

shorts” buying a pretzel. This

contributed to a very long queue,

meaning our protagonist’s kid could

not get their hands on a salty snack.

“I fucking hate childless women

with a BURNING PASSION!!!” the

post ends. There are several angry

emoji faces for emphasis.

While this Facebook post is quite

old, someone on Twitter recently

dug it up and started taking the

mickey. It has now sparked a furious

online debate about whether

childfree people should be allowed

to enter Disney-branded parks. My

own thoughts on the matter are

that something is very wrong with

you if you are childfree and want to

spend a small fortune surrounded

by other people’s kids in a mouse-

infested amusement park. Why not

just throw away your money on

e-cigarettes and slutty shorts like the

feckless childfree millennial you are?

A couple of years ago, some angry

parents called for a boycott of the

Chart Room , a coff ee shop in Devon

that had a no-kids-under-12 policy.

“Can anyone tell me just what kind

of town we’re living in when dogs

are allowed into an establishment

and children are not?” one resident

demanded. You know what I call

that kind of town? Somewhere I

want to move immediately.

Why we should all be

unfollowing Trump

on Twitter

When life

gives you a

grasshopper

invasion ...

Ar wa

Mahdawi

PHOTOGRAPHS: MOD; ALAMY; GETTYCOVER: LONDON FEATURES

bathroom surfaces and bundle every

miniature into your suitcase.

At least there is a slim chance of

them being used up. According to

Gwen Powell, the founder of

cleanconscience.org.uk , a charitable

initiative to recycle hotel toiletries,

some 200 m miniatures are dumped

from UK hotels into landfi ll each year.

Housed in plastic, they will remain

for hundreds of years in rubbish

dumps, giving future anthropologists

the opportunity to ponder whether

any human ever used more than a

tablespoon of ginseng shower gel

before ditching the bottle.

As hotels begin to shun

miniatures – legislators in California

are hoping to ban them altogether

• it’s a good time to change your
  own habits. Avoid stocking up on
  travel-sized toiletries or any pump
  dispensers that you cannot refi ll.
  If you do buy small, get an organic/
  eco brand such as Dr Bronner,
  and wash and reuse it afterwards.
  Better still, invest in a nice set of
  designated refi llables – I consider
  the 14-piece bottle-and-jar set and
  travel cube from Beschan.com to be
  the Tupperware of the suitcase – and
  refi ll from your own bulk toiletries at
  home, refi lling these in a bulk store.
  Or there’s always Lush. The brand
  makes it easy to swap a bottle for a
  bar. Previously, many of its “naked”
  (plastic-free) range came in tins,
  which seemed a bit scout camp,
  but now you can get shampoo and
  conditioner bars in cork pots. By the
  way, these were recently delivered to
  Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat.
  Lucy Siegle

WWWWWWWWWWhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhe

ggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive

gras

inva

Say

ers

y

ng

eevery

The Duchess of

Sussex shows

off her two

wedding dresses

РЕЛИЗ ПОДГОТОВИЛА ГРУППА "What's News" VK.COM/WSNWS

ЛИ

ЗП

ООДД

ДLucy Siegle Lucy Siegle Lucy Siegle Lucy Siegle ГГГО

Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat.

О

Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat.

Lucy Siegle Lucy Siegle О

Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat. Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat. Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat. Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat. ТТО

В

way, these were recently delivered to

В

way, these were recently delivered to

Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat. Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat. В

way, these were recently delivered to way, these were recently delivered to ИИ

Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat.

И

Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat.

way, these were recently delivered to way, these were recently delivered to way, these were recently delivered to way, these were recently delivered to ЛАА

conditioner bars in cork pots. By the conditioner bars in cork pots. By the ГГ

way, these were recently delivered to

Г

way, these were recently delivered to

conditioner bars in cork pots. By the conditioner bars in cork pots. By the conditioner bars in cork pots. By the conditioner bars in cork pots. By the РУУП

but now you can get shampoo and

П

but now you can get shampoo and

conditioner bars in cork pots. By the conditioner bars in cork pots. By the П

but now you can get shampoo and but now you can get shampoo and but now you can get shampoo and but now you can get shampoo and ППАА

"What's "What's

Lucy Siegle

"What's

Lucy Siegle News"

way, these were recently delivered to

News"

way, these were recently delivered to

Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat.

News"

Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat.

Lucy Siegle Lucy Siegle News"

VK.COM/WSNWSVK.COM/WSNWS

Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat.

VK.COM/WSNWS

Lush’s Dorset HQ by sail boat.

Lucy Siegle

VK.COM/WSNWS

Lucy Siegle