Fotos: Jamakosy, tatniz/istock.com, privatSpotlight 9/2019 AMERICAN LIFEanxiously [(ÄNkSEsli]
, gespannt, ungeduldig
appreciate [E(pri:SieIt]
, begrüßen, schätzen
booze [bu:z] ifml.
, Alk(ohol)
bottom-shelf [(bA:tEm Self]
, hier: billig, schlecht
corkscrew [(kO:rkskru:]
, Korkenzieher
damp [dÄmp]
, feuchtliquor [(lIk&r]
, alkoholische Getränk(e)
musty [(mVsti]
, muffig, modrig
rascal [(rÄsk&l]
, Halunke, Gauner
sample [(sÄmp&l]
, Muster, Probestück
sooty [(sUti]
, rußig
subscribe to sth. [sEb(skraIb tu]
, etw. abonnierenAMERICAN LIFE
n the lakeside resort where I live, the summer folk
never tire of joking with us year-round residents that
we must be crazy to put up with the long winters.
This year, I decided that the joke should be on them.
I put an article in our local newspaper, which most of
the summer people subscribe to. This is what I wrote:
“Those of us who stay here all year are anxiously
awaiting your return. We’ve grown tired of hang-
ing out with the same 13 people over many, many
months. I know that you wonder what we do here
from October until May, so let me explain.
Since nothing is open after you leave, we party at
each other’s homes. But after a while, we start looking
for alternatives. Many of you have beautiful homes,
and we are certain that you would love to have us
stop in to check on things. This helps you by giving
your home that ‘lived-in’ look — you know, lots of
cars in the driveway and lights on all over the house.
Since we know that many of you will be coming back
here very shortly, we felt that we should update you
on a few things.
Jane and Brian: You moved your house key to a
new hiding place this year, you rascals! It was a bit of
a problem when we arrived at your place for our par-
ty, especially since the temperature had sunk below
zero. But we found the key, so no worries. In fact, it
was a bit too easy. We decided to hide it in a far safer
place. Good luck finding it!
Susie and Peter: The liquor at your place was not
the best. But there aren’t any liquor stores nearby, so
we had to settle for your bottom-shelf stuff. You bet-
ter stop on the way here and get some higher-quality
booze. You’ll need a new supply anyway since we did
manage to finish it all.
Julia and Scott: Do you know about the problems
with your fireplace? Anyway, the house got kind ofsmoky when we lit a fire, and the walls got sooty. We
felt bad about that, so we painted them for you. We
chose black paint so you wouldn’t notice the soot. Of
course, if you don’t like the idea of black walls, you
might want to bring some cans of paint along with
you when you come.
Suzanne and Jim: With all your plants, we knew
you’d appreciate us coming by to water them. And,
while there, we of course made ourselves at home.
One evening, though, someone was looking for a
corkscrew and opened a drawer — and found it com-
pletely filled with water. That was when we also no-
ticed that our socks were getting wet from walking
around on your damp carpet. We realized then that
your plants are all fake. Now the problem is that your
carpeting has a musty smell. We recommend that
you bring along some new carpet samples.
If any of you are worried about what might have
been going on in your house over the winter, we’ll be
happy to stop by and check things out for you. And if
all this news isn’t enough to make you want to jump
in your car and hurry back here, we don’t know what
is. We’ll be glad to see you!”GINGER KUENZEL
is a freelance
writer who lived
in Munich for 20
years. She now
calls a small
town in upstate
New York home.Summertime
returns
Unsere Korrespondentin lebt in einer Gegend, in der viele
Leute Ferienhäuschen haben. Hier erfahren Sie, wie sie und
ihre Kumpels die Sommerfrischler zurückbegrüßen.MEDIUM US PLUSI
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