Stress and Health 429the first place. That could be dangerous, so the aggression is reserved for another less
threatening or weaker target. For example, unemployment and financial difficulties are
extremely frustrating, as they block a person’s ability to maintain a certain standard of
living and acquire desired possessions. In one study, male unemployment and single
parenthood were the two factors most highly correlated to rates of child abuse (Gillham
et al., 1998). Unemployment is also one of the factors correlated most highly with the
murder of abused women, creating four times the risk of murder for women in abusive
relationships (Campbell & Wolf, 2003). Both studies are examples of displaced aggression
toward the weaker targets of children and women. Such targets often become scapegoats,
or habitual targets of displaced aggression. Scapegoats are often pets, children, spouses,
and even minority groups (who are seen as having less power). to Learning
Objective 12.10.
Another possible reaction to frustration is escape or withdrawal. Escape or with-
drawal can take the form of leaving, dropping out of school, quitting a job, or ending
a relationship. Some people manage a psychological escape or withdrawal into apathy
(ceasing to care about or act upon the situation), fantasy (which is only a temporary
escape), or the use of drugs. Obviously the latter reaction can lead to even more prob-
lems. Others resort to what they see as the final escape: suicide.
CONFLICT Whenever you find yourself torn between two or more competing and
incompatible desires, goals, or actions, you are in conflict. There are different forms of
conflict, depending upon the nature of the incompatible desires, goals, or actions.
Approach–Approach Conflict. In an approach–approach conflict, a person experiences
desire for two goals, each of which is attractive. Typically, this type of conflict, often
called a “win–win situation,” is relatively easy to resolve and does not involve a great
deal of stress. Because both goals are desirable, the only stress involved is having to
choose between them, acquiring one and losing the other. An example of this might be
the need to choose between the chocolate cake or key lime pie for dessert or from among
several good choices for a date to the prom. “Six on one hand, half a dozen on the other”
is a phrase that sums up this conflict nicely.
Avoidance–Avoidance Conflict. Avoidance–avoidance conflicts are much more stressful.
In this conflict, the choice is between two or more goals or events that are unpleasant.
This type of conflict is so common that there are numerous phrases to sym-
bolize it, for example, “caught between a rock and a hard place,” “between
the devil and the deep blue sea,” “out of the frying pan into the fire,” and
“lose–lose situation.” People who are fearful of dental procedures might
face the conflict of suffering the pain of a toothache or going to the dentist.
Because neither alternative is pleasant, many people avoid making a choice
by delaying decisions (Tversky & Shafir, 1992). For example, given the choice
of risky back surgery or living with the pain, some people would wait, hop-
ing that the pain would go away on its own and relieve them of the need to
make a choice.
Approach–Avoidance Conflict. Approach–avoidance conflicts are a bit different
in that they only involve one goal or event. That goal or event may have both
positive and negative aspects that make the goal appealing and yet unap-
pealing at the same time. For example, marriage is a big decision to make
for anyone and usually has both its attractive features, such as togetherness,
sharing good times, and companionship, and also its negative aspects, such
as disagreements, money issues, and mortgages. This is perhaps the most
stressful of all of the types of conflict, causing many people to vacillate* or
escape or withdrawal
leaving the presence of a stressor,
either literally or by a psychological
withdrawal into fantasy, drug abuse,
or apathy.approach–approach conflict
conflict occurring when a person must
choose between two desirable goals.avoidance–avoidance conflicts
conflict occurring when a person must
choose between two undesirable goals.approach–avoidance conflicts
conflict occurring when a person must
choose or not choose a goal that has
both positive and negative aspects.*vacillate: to go back and forth between one decision and another.
This couple has just purchased their first house, a rite
of passage for many young couples. The decision to become
a homeowner, with the “pulls” of privacy and earning equity
and the “pushes” of mortgage payments and upkeep, is often
an approach–avoidance conflict.