CHEESYBITE
Q:Howdidthehipster
burnhismouth?A:Heatethepizzabefore
it wascool.LaughterOn the Flop
What do you call a lazy baby
kangaroo? A pouch potato.
SUBMITTED BY JACOB SCHOLL
Fresh Talk
Farmer McDonald set up a roadside
stand to sell his fresh vegetables,
and a very curious customer asked
McDonald if his tomatoes were
genetically modified.
“No, not at all,” said the tomatoes.
theirishgifthouse.com
Rolling in It
A plumber fixes a
leak in a doctor’s
house, then bills
him for $1000.
“This is
ridiculous!”
the doctor says.
“I don’t even charge
that much.”
The plumber says,
“Neither did I when
I was a doctor.”
theplumbinginfo.com
DEVIL OF A READ
Librarian/humorist Roz
Warren took to Facebook to ask
her librarian friends a question:
if they died and were sent to
hell, which they discovered
had just one book available
to read, what would it be?
Here’s the literature worthy
of Satan’s bookshelf:“The manual to our office
phone system.”
“Dante’s Inferno; it would
be like having a Frommer’s
travel guide.”
“The second book in a trilogy.”
“My ex’s diary.”“Brimstone for Dummies.”
“The Bible, so I could look
for loopholes.”61