9781529032178

heart there is no chance that someone could enter. I will not give in to
desperation. I deserve to be happy!
Attachment Style: __
Answer: Anxious. This is a clear account of someone anxious who’s
been hurt many times before. She’s very absorbed in finding someone. She
wants to get out there and find her soul mate, but because she is unfamiliar
with attachment principles, she doesn’t know who to avoid and who to trust.
Suzanne is very different from Paul in example 4. She is not looking for the
“ideal” partner. We get an idea of what the matter is and why she hasn’t met
someone yet—she gets close and then gets hurt, but she continues to yearn
for closeness. Paul will not get close until he meets the “right woman.”
People like Suzanne are one of the reasons we wrote this book. She
desperately wants to meet someone, yet she’s been burned before and fears
rejection. She knows the painful fallout of dating the wrong guy and she’s
become fearful of that pain almost to the point of giving up. Because she
craves intimacy, she feels lonely and incomplete, but she has no clue how to
assess potential partners. With knowledge of applied adult attachment, we
have seen people like Suzanne learn how to navigate the world of dating,
steer clear of avoidants, and land safely in the arms of a nurturing, secure
partner.