[Chuckles knowingly] Oh, yes. Oh yes, completely.
The interesting thing is, you could say there are
two different ways of seeing my life, and life in
general, because the process itself was coming
from a different understanding to theone that
I have now. In the sense that if I had donethe
film now, I would do a completely different film.
With a different approach. That’s what happens
when you spend two or three years in a very
introspective search into memory, and then
trying to reproduce every single one of those
details and moments. Reproducing the spaces
the way that I remember as a child, and
reproducing moments in the way I remember;
the same spaces, or reproductions of those
spaces, with actors that look and felt exactly
the same as the original people... Inevitably,
something happens. While I was doing the film,
I was not aware of that change, you know?
So what would the film be if you made it
now? What would change, knowing what
you know now?
Oh, I don’t know. That’s a different conversation.
Maybe if I had that conversation, I would
have to do the film again. And frankly, I’m not
interested! [laughs]
Did the experience almost feel like a very
expensive form of therapy? I mean, you were
filming on the exact street where you grew
up. What sort of feelings were being thrown
up by that?
Well, that’s the thing. It was very complex. One
thing is, yes, there’s a lot of stuff going on inside
you but at the same time, you are in operation
mode. You are directing a film with a lot of
people around you, huge crews and a lot of
logistics, and a huge obsession about details that
I would go just completely mad about. I was so
focused that, because of the process, I didn’t
really have any idea what I was doing, in the
sense of what was going to be the final result.
I trusted that I had to just make everything
very intuitive. Even if I had my screenplay,
the important thing was not the reproduction
of moments, but the creation of moments based
upon that point of departure. So I was kind of
distracted. I was not aware of
what was going on inside me.
One morning, shooting on the
street where I grew up, I was
completely cranky. I was not
happy with the scene. I was
very upset. So much so that
I had to take a walk. I said,
“I just need five.” I walked to
the end of the street and I
looked around and I said [to
myself ], “Oh shit. Calm down.
Why are you so upset? Look
around you. You’re being given
this amazing opportunity to
turn this place into the way
that it was in your childhood.”
It was exactly the same cars,
with exactly the same colours.
Below, top to
bottom: Violence
spills out onto the
streets of Colonia
Roma; New Year’s
Eve revellers try
to help extinguish
a forest fi re;
Unhappy families.All the extras playing neighbours were exact
look-alikes of the neighbours who used to live
there. “This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity,
that I’m allowed to do this! This is amazing. Just
enjoy it!” So I went back. The scene was not
working. I tell the actor [Fernando Grediaga,
playing the absent father]: “In this moment, you
feel suff ocated. You cannot breathe in your
situation anymore. You need to get out. This
situation is unbearable for you.” He does it and
it’s beautiful, the way that he does it. And I
realise that I’m shooting the scene in which my
father left my family. You’re directing, so you
cannot be judgemental. You just have to talk
about motivations. That’s why I was so pissed
off. And that’s one that I caught! Most of the
stuff that was playing with my moods and my
emotions was stuff that I didn’t even recognise
in the moment.Did the fi lm force you to confront these
very formative moments in your life?
Well, the process [of making the fi lm] was
a process of confrontation. You’re confronting
your present with your past. I wanted to do a fi lm
not about the past, but about a past from the
standpoint of my understanding of the present.
And that present, right now, is a person [who]
is transformed by the experience of doing the
fi lm. So, again, it’s changed the perspective
completely. I get that in every act that you do:
there’s a certain amount of fl uidity, of change.
But this process was particularly intense because
I was playing with my memories and the spaces
and the energy of the places.