say something today that offended you? So what! Thats their problem. He
paused drmatically. Did someone look at you the wrong way? So what!
Thats their problem. Again, a pause for the magnitude of that sentiment to
sink in. Replace your petty thoughts of anger, exaperation, and spite with
thoughts of strength. Calm down. Rise above those little insignificant
irritations in life. Focus your thoughts in the direction of fulfillment and
accomplishment. Once
again, this is Dan. Im surprised he didnt also leave his agents phone
number here. Leave your message at the tone. And have a great peaceful
day. Beep.
The first time I listened to Dans inspirational message, the length mildly
irritated me. The second time, I found myself hypeventilating while waiting
for him to get through his unbearably long message. By the third call, his
schmaltzy message seemed interminable. I was filled with those petty
thoughts of anger, exaperation, and spite he warned against because of his
darn mesage. I found it impossible to rise above it and focus my thoughts in
the direction of fulfillment and accomplishment. I wanted to punch him in
the nose. Outgoing messages are not the venues to give inspirational
messages or to impress the world with ones accomplishments.
Another friend of mine, a writer, earned herself a few little cat stripes
with this one on her machine:
Hello, this is Cheryl Smith. Cheryl is on her national book tour, (she
paused so all callers could be appropriately impressed) making appearances
in twelve cities. (Another pause as though awaiting applause.) Shell be
returning on October 7. (Whats this she bit? Cheryl herself is speaking.)
Please leave your mesage for her at the tone. Beep.
Yes, Cheryl, we know youre an important author. But your third-party
reference to self, your narcissistic tone of voice, and topping it off with
twelve cities would make any big cat snicker through his whiskers.
One last codicil: Avoid one particular message many busnesspeople use
these daysIm either away from my desk or on the other line. The subtext of
this message is Im a slave chained to my desk and it is an amazing fact that
I have escaped for the moment. One night I was working into the wee
hours. At 4 a.m. I decided to leave a message on a colleagues business
phone so shed get it as soon as she came in at nine. Hello, the message
How to Impress Everyone with Your Outgoing Voicemail Message 251
ooja
(Ooja)
#1